Silicon Valley

Finding Love After IPO

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You’ve poured your life into building your business. Long hours, lack of sleep, endless meetings have been your priority and, now, your time and dedication has paid off—your company is going public.

 

And, just like that, your social presence grows overnight. You’re inundated with speaking requests. You’re also inundated with a lot of romantic interest.

 

I’ve met several executives eager to re-prioritize their personal goals in the wake of an IPO. I’ve seen them struggle to find the right person—or even just a legitimate date—after coming into wealth and extra publicity. Ironically, for these clients, I’ve seen the dating space morph into a minefield of sorts.

 

How do you know if your next date is dating you for the right reasons?

 

How can you be sure that your private dating life stays private?

 

How will you know where to find the most eligible singles?

 

Just as you would hire a personal trainer to get fit or an accountant to organize your finances, I’ve been hired countless times to help extremely discerning clientele find their next partner.

 

To help my clients understand what they want in their next relationship and how to get it, I compare the process for finding the right partner to building a business.

 

  1. What problem are you trying to solve?

Perhaps you’re trying to remedy loneliness or are interested in building partnership. Maybe you’d like to “feel alive” with no strings attached, or you’re finally thinking it’s time to start a family. Most successful products and businesses are created to solve a specific problem—what’s yours?

 

Not sure where to start?

 

Envision your future. In five years, what kind of life do you envision? Where are you living? What are you doing? What would your mother say about you? How would your best friend describe you? Write it down.

 

  1. Set realistic expectations about the process.

What steps will you take in the short term to help meet your goals? Clients tend to be clear on their goals, but they can get a little lost on the game plan.

 

Some questions to ask yourself:

 

How much time do you plan to carve out per week to devote to your dating life?

 

How will you meet new people?

 

How will you date? Casual introductions over wine? Grand romantic gestures?

 

  1. Keep Iterating.

The qualities you look for may change during the dating process. Be open to the process and be prepared to adjust your ideas accordingly. Whereas it’s perfectly natural to have preferences (don’t we all?), you might find that your more urgent needs are satisfied by someone without the specific packaging.

 

Tip: Compromise on the packaging, never the standards.

 

  1. Hire your Weaknesses.

The demands of growing an empire may have distracted you from fine tuning your dating skills. Constant travel and other obligations may have limited your interactions to people in your professional network. Instead of trying to solve every problem at once, heed the words of billionaire Spanx founder Sara Blakely and “hire your weaknesses.”

 

Find the person you can trust; the person who has demonstrated enough experience in the realm of long-term relationships to help you make the best decision of your life. In the wake of money, media attention, and limited time, an extra pair of eyes, ears, and vetting could pay a lifetime of dividends.

 

With over a decades’ worth of experience serving high-profile clientele, I’m privy to the unique demands and sensitivities involved in the search for partnership. If you’re ready to hand off the reins to Silicon Valley’s leading matchmaker, get in touch.

 

Love and best wishes ❤️,

Amy

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Linx on Instagram! ms.linxdating

Dear Faithful Readers,

Yes, I am very behind the times setting up a professional account for Instagram but at long last, it’s up!

Please follow me on Instagram at  ms.linxdating  

If you enjoy all things related to Linx, dating, relationships, events, VIP client travel, glamour, and happenings in Silicon Valley and beyond please follow!

XO,

Amy

Friends with an ex: Worth the time or time to move on?

 

iStock_000042224340_Small.jpgAfter sharing love and a life together, severing all contact with an ex sounds like a harsh outcome to say the least, but is maintaining ties with an ex worthwhile? Traditional advice seems to support “clean breaks” and “moving on”, but is there something to be said for pursing friendship in lieu of separation?

 

Is friendship with an ex even possible?

 

According to The Journal of Social Psychology, friendship after a breakup is more likely if you and your ex were friends prior to the relationship.; the transition is easier if both parties have experience in the platonic realm. Conversely, if sparks flew shortly after meeting, you stand to endure more pain and awkwardness as the romance falls away.

 

The nature of the breakup will also impact the opportunity for friendship. Naturally, break ups that included heated endings—arguments, cheating, or any sort of perceived hostility—jeopardize chances of friendship. However, if the dumper used “de-escalation” tactics—or slowly started pulling away, the ex-partner has time to adjust and consider an alternative dynamic.

 

Why stay friends?

 

If you do decide to remain friends, have an honest conversation with yourself about your motivations. According to a research study published in the Journal of Personality and Individual Differences, your desire to remain friends after the relationship probably falls under one of the following reasons:

 

Reliability/sentimentality: your ex “gets you” and you can count on him or her to have your back.

 

Pragmatism: your ex makes your life easier. Your ex has resources you want—connections to business prospects, money, or skills you need.

 

Continued romantic attraction: You’re still in love.

 

Children and shared resources: Joint loans, kids, mortgages, etc. are obligations that make severing contact difficult if not impossible.

 

Diminished romantic attraction: Although the passion has waned, you still share an emotional connection.

 

Social relationship maintenance:You have similar friend groups or family friends.

 

Sexual access: Maintaining enough connectivity to ensure sexual opportunities or, simply, a friends with benefits situation.

 

Although reliability was the prevailing reason for friendship among both women and men, men were more likely to rate pragmatism and sexual access higher than women.

 

If you are pushing for friendship, be sure it’s friendship you’re actually looking for. To get your answer, ask yourself the following:

  • Are you scared to lose support, advice, and comfort?
  • Are you trying to avoid grief?
  • Do you want the benefits of partnership (i.e. sex) without a formalized commitment?

 

If you’ve answered “yes” to any of these questions, you might be more interested in filling a void than pursuing a true friendship. If you find yourself pursuing contact for these reasons, the pain and stress of the breakup are probably encouraging some unhealthy rollercoaster emotions.

 

Using friendship as a crutch while your relationship dies will prolong the agony of heartbreak. The sooner you cut ties and take time for yourself—on your own—the sooner you may have an opportunity to pursue friendship.

 

What does creating space for friendship with an ex look like?

 

Firstly—and this may sound dramatic—defriend your ex on Facebook. According to research that appears in the Cyberpsychology, Behavior, and Social Networking, monitoring an ex on Facebook “exacerbates feelings of distress…and increases feelings of sexual desire and longing for an ex partner.” Although people who de-friended exes still experienced some setbacks in personal growth during their breakup, ultimately they reported less negative feelings than their stalker counterparts.

 

Instead of focusing on the friendship with an ex, you might find more value in revisiting your platonic relationships. The Journal of Social and Personal Relationships revealed that cross-sex friends who have always been platonic offer more satisfaction than cross-sex friends who have been lovers. Without sexual attraction or a need to get more serious, platonic friends share a pure connection.

 

Regardless of what you decide, give yourself—and your ex—and opportunity to adjust to the being single. If you do decide to pursue friendship, realize that the strong emotional connection you continue to share could complicate—at best—or preclude—at worst—your chances of establishing a new, totally fulfilling relationship.

New testimonial

“Amy Andersen is in a league of her own! My experience with her has been so enjoyable and has reminded me of how much fun that dating can be. She has a keen attention to detail, succinct prescreening questions, and a knack for working with high quality people that are commitment minded. What makes her stand out above all is her follow up and genuine interest in a positive outcome… I have yet to meet another matchmaker on her level that has been such a dating expert – she’s actually like a dating coach. All relationships would go much more smoothly if Amy was there as a dating coach…”

-LA based 30-something entrepreneurial female

Matchmaking Magic 🤩 🏹

Spring is on the horizon (thank goodness!) and there are so many Linx couples who are exclusive and completely in love. As founder of Linx, in my 16 years of running my company, quite honestly, I have never seen anything like it. My craft has been significantly fine-tuned over the years and so much of my matchmaking style goes on “gut” and instinct. Far less on metrics and science. I am predicting many engagements occurring in the next 12 months.

Here is a testimonial from a former client who’s now off-the-market. He’s extremely private but agreed to write something for you readers to enjoy…

“I was a skeptical of matchmaking and Amy completely changed my views on that. The third person she matched me with is truly the soulmate I have been looking for in the 8 years since I got divorced.
had never come close to finding true love with my numerous mobile app dates. Her process was very detailed and I appreciate she spent considerable time in-person getting to know me.
I am over the moon now that I found my beautiful and amazing sweetheart through Amy.
When you search for a needle in a haystack you are far better off with the help of a needle magnet like Amy! Don’t waste your time elsewhere!” 
 
– Anonymous 40-something entrepreneur 

Event of the year…..March 5th…!

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The Best of Silicon Valley 2019 Party brings to life the January & February “Best of Silicon Valley” issue!
Party the night away at the Rosewood Sand Hill Hotel with fabulous chef prepared foods, live music, amazing cocktails, and mingle with the Valley’s most desirable movers and shakers.
This event supports the Junior League of Palo Alto, Mid-Peninsula and will be a great way to meet like-minded people, while supporting a wonderful cause. This is not a Linx Dating event, instead Modern Luxury’s premier party of the year.
Linx will be in attendance, so please come say hi and toast to good people, positive energy, and new connections. Need a little dating advice or want to talk to me about matchmaking, just ask me there. Happy to chat discreetly.

When: Tuesday, March 5, 2019 | 6:00-8:30 pm

Where: The Rosewood Sand Hill Hotel | Menlo Park, CA, complimentary valet

Cocktail Attire, dress and look your best. Ladies bring a wrap or jacket as guests will be spilling over onto the lawn outside and the evening hours can get very chilly.

Tickets are only $85.00 and can be purchased here ⬇️:

 

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/best-of-silicon-valley-2019-tickets-57056277863

 

Event partners include:

Alexander’s Steakhouse
Blackened Whiskey
Cetrella Restaurant
La Mienne
Puesto
Sonoma Valley Wines
Stephen Silver Fine Jewelry
WhistlePig Whiskey

 

Matchmaking In a League of Our Own

When you hire Linx Dating to find the ❤️ of your life, you work directly with me, Amy Andersen. As my client, you receive my individual attention and I am involved in absolutely every aspect of the matchmaking process. What are some aspects that make Linx far superior and different compared to run-of-the-mill matchmaking firms and so called “dating services?” Here are some differentiating points that separate Linx and put Linx in a league of its own.

-Linx is discreet, does not cater to the masses, represents a very high caliber group of clientele who seek out its niche, highly reputable approach to matchmaking, and has built a stellar reputation over 15 years.

-There are many other services that claim to be exclusive and to be working with elite clients, but the reality is they are broadcasting their services in airline magazines.   Linx is the only upscale matchmaking firm not to advertise its services – we do not need to, as our client base is built via word-of-mouth referrals from happy clients and ours/their extended social and professional networks.

-Being selective in whom we admit for membership and, in return, doing an excellent job for our clients,  Linx holds itself to a higher level of ethnical business standards. Many local Bay Area and “global” businesses have gone out of business or deal with very unfortunate ramifications from bad business practices. It has never been our goal as a business to take on more clients than we can handle or to be so eager as to close business without really making sure that it is mutually synergistic. *That* is precisely where other matchmakers run into trouble. Most agencies are so focused on “closing the deal” and can come across as extremely pushy and frankly don’t really care about the actual prospect or their unique story.

-We personally vet every match in painstaking detail so that each introduction is carefully curated and worth a serious investment of your time in getting to know them. This is the antithesis of online or offline “volume dating” where you might hope to get lucky with the law of large numbers.

-Linx is extremely proud to represent many FEMALES as clients. It sounds “backwards” but the truth is that most firms don’t represent educated and dynamic women as actual clients. Linx represents many extremely bright, sophisticated, and elegant women as our clients who also have stellar academic backgrounds, for example. Should you research other firms, most firms would simply place you in their passive database with thousands of other women, rather than take you on as a fulltime client.

-We provide highly personalized service in all aspects of the experience. Linx accepts only a select number of members annually and one of the appeals is that they work with me, the founder and CEO, directly throughout the search. In addition to Linx matchmaking, we have partnerships with exclusive lifestyle and luxury international concierge agents, as well as, stylists, fitness trainers, dermatologists, plastic surgeons, domestic and estate help, and much more.

-Linx is highly responsive at all times, 24-7.  Why? Because I care. I am beyond passionate about my craft and feel extremely grateful to work with the best of the best clientele.