Put a ring on it: Engagement ring shopping 101

As you can imagine, the engagement ring will arguably be the biggest part of any proposal- besides her saying “YES!” To help all my favorite bachelor clients blossom into confident grooms, I’ve put together a little cheat sheet.

Finding the perfect stone, band and setting can be tricky, especially when you’ll probably end up shopping alone—WeddingWire’s 2019 Wedding Report shows that only 20% of couples pick out a ring together. So, how can you find the right ring to symbolize your forever commitment? 

Diamonds really are a girl’s best friend

Although any stone can be used for an engagement ring, WeddingWire’s 2019 Wedding Report shows that 71% of engagement rings have a diamond as the main stone. According to the American Gem Society, diamonds have signified union since the 1400’s when Maximilian of Austria proposed to Mary of Burgundy. 

Sizing

If you’re planning a surprise engagement, purchasing the right ring size will require a little finesse. To save yourself the headache and extra expense of resizing, simply steal a ring that you’ve seen your partner wearing on a ring finger and bring that to the jeweler to measure. Remember, some settings won’t accommodate a change in band size, so do whatever you have to do to make sure you get the size right.

Shape

Most diamond rings are one of ten unique shapes. Although most women prefer the traditional round shaped diamond, others may enjoy something more unusual. According to The Knot, different shapes can represent different personalities.

For example, an emerald cut tends to be more glamorous, the asscher cut suited to a vintage lover, and the marquise more romantic.

In addition to shape, consider the size of your partner’s hand. Pear, marquis, or oval shaped diamonds tend to suit long, slender fingers, whereas round or princess shaped diamonds are better for smaller hands.

Although shape is important, the cut will impact the quality of the diamond the most. Whereas shape is about the geometry of the stone, the cut is about the angles of the facets. 

The 4 C’s: A Matter of Quality

The Gemological Institute of America created the 4Cs to assess diamond quality. Those 4Cs include:

Cut describes how well a diamond’s facets interact with the light. A well cut diamond will sparkle through the top of the stone. Of all the 4Cs, cut is the most complex to analyze since it’s based on 7 factors: brightness, fire, scintillation, weight ratio, polish, symmetry, and durability. Cut is also the most important “C”; even if the remaining 3 C’s are perfect, it won’t matter if the cut isn’t right. 

Clarity describes the cloudiness of the stone. Naturally occurring internal “inclusions” and external “blemishes” can lower the value of the diamond. While no diamond is perfectly pure, the closer it comes, the higher its value. 

As a general rule, try to avoid stones with inclusions on the top and in the middle. These areas have the biggest effect on the way the light passes through 

Color is graded based on how little of it exists. The grading system ranges from D (colorless) to Z (light yellow); white color diamonds are the most popular (and tend to carry more value) but yellow diamonds and even black diamonds have grown in popularity.

Carat describes how much a diamond weighs. Diamond price increases with carat weight, because larger diamonds are more rare and more desirable. But, two diamonds of equal carat weight can have very different values (and prices) depending on the other 4C factors.

Settings and Metal

The setting, which describes how the diamond is placed on the ring, plays a big role in the look and feel of the ring. According to WeddingWire, the setting is the most important feature for women, whereas the quality of the stone is most important to men.

Just like the shape, there are a variety of different settings:

As you can imagine, different settings offer different benefits: The Halo is ideal for those who love a bit more sparkle, the Bezel setting offers a clean and modern look, and the Prong setting can really highlight the beauty of a main stone. 

When it comes to the metal for the band, gold and platinum are generally the most popular choices. Platinum is the most expensive given its purity. It’s also a great hypoallergenic choice for those with sensitive skin. Gold offers more flexibility with colors, including white, yellow, rose and even green.

Get your certificates

Before purchasing, ask to see the grading certificate from a recognized gemological lab like the American Gem Society or the Gemological Institute of America; it’s the best way to ensure that you’re getting exactly what you’re paying for. And, please, please, please insure your ring as soon as you get home!

5 Questions to ask your prospective matchmaker when choosing which firm to work with:

1. How did you get into matchmaking – why do you do what you do?
2. How, and from where, do you source potential matches as “leads” and what is your subsequent vetting process?  In other words, what is the “secret sauce?”
3. Are my ideal match criteria realistic and do you honestly feel that you have high quality candidates for me in your existing database or would you need to source outside the current database?
4. At what point does a “match” become “official?” May I veto potential matches or do you unilaterally make that call?
5. Tell me about a recent success story of yours and why you matched that particular couple.

Finding Love After IPO

You’ve poured your life into building your business. Long hours, lack of sleep, endless meetings have been your priority and, now, your time and dedication has paid off—your company is going public.

 

And, just like that, your social presence grows overnight. You’re inundated with speaking requests. You’re also inundated with a lot of romantic interest.

 

I’ve met several executives eager to re-prioritize their personal goals in the wake of an IPO. I’ve seen them struggle to find the right person—or even just a legitimate date—after coming into wealth and extra publicity. Ironically, for these clients, I’ve seen the dating space morph into a minefield of sorts.

 

How do you know if your next date is dating you for the right reasons?

 

How can you be sure that your private dating life stays private?

 

How will you know where to find the most eligible singles?

 

Just as you would hire a personal trainer to get fit or an accountant to organize your finances, I’ve been hired countless times to help extremely discerning clientele find their next partner.

 

To help my clients understand what they want in their next relationship and how to get it, I compare the process for finding the right partner to building a business.

 

1. What problem are you trying to solve?

Perhaps you’re trying to remedy loneliness or are interested in building partnership. Maybe you’d like to “feel alive” with no strings attached, or you’re finally thinking it’s time to start a family. Most successful products and businesses are created to solve a specific problem—what’s yours?

 

Not sure where to start?

 

Envision your future. In five years, what kind of life do you envision? Where are you living? What are you doing? What would your mother say about you? How would your best friend describe you? Write it down.

 

2. Set realistic expectations about the process.

What steps will you take in the short term to help meet your goals? Clients tend to be clear on their goals, but they can get a little lost on the game plan.

 

Some questions to ask yourself:

 

How much time do you plan to carve out per week to devote to your dating life?

 

How will you meet new people?

 

How will you date? Casual introductions over wine? Grand romantic gestures?

 

3. Keep Iterating.

The qualities you look for may change during the dating process. Be open to the process and be prepared to adjust your ideas accordingly. Whereas it’s perfectly natural to have preferences (don’t we all?), you might find that your more urgent needs are satisfied by someone without the specific packaging.

 

Tip: Compromise on the packaging, never the standards.

 

4. Hire your Weaknesses.

The demands of growing an empire may have distracted you from fine tuning your dating skills. Constant travel and other obligations may have limited your interactions to people in your professional network. Instead of trying to solve every problem at once, heed the words of billionaire Spanx founder Sara Blakely and “hire your weaknesses.”

 

Find the person you can trust; the person who has demonstrated enough experience in the realm of long-term relationships to help you make the best decision of your life. In the wake of money, media attention, and limited time, an extra pair of eyes, ears, and vetting could pay a lifetime of dividends.

 

With over a decades’ worth of experience serving high-profile clientele, I’m privy to the unique demands and sensitivities involved in the search for partnership. If you’re ready to hand off the reins to Silicon Valley’s leading matchmaker, get in touch.

 

Love and best wishes ❤️,

Amy

 

 

Linx on Instagram! ms.linxdating

Dear Faithful Readers,

Yes, I am very behind the times setting up a professional account for Instagram but at long last, it’s up!

Please follow me on Instagram at  ms.linxdating  

If you enjoy all things related to Linx, dating, relationships, events, VIP client travel, glamour, and happenings in Silicon Valley and beyond please follow!

XO,

Amy

Dreaming of the OC….VIP bachelor searches for his So Cal sweetheart….

We are over-the-moon to announce another VIP search!  Linx VIP’s are extremely committed to finding the love of their lives. Due to our scrupulous selection process of who we admit to become our next VIP client, coupled with it being 100% the right timing in their lives, they go off the market FAST once we find the right “needle in a haystack” match for them.

Currently, we represent an elite handful of VIPs around the world and majority of these clients are off-the-market and planning their future with their respective match.  Most of these success stories stem back to our clients first or second introduction and voilà our challenging job is done! 

Our new VIP is anything sort of exceptional and the Linx ladies know first-hand having flown down to Orange County to spend a day in his beautiful home and surroundings. What other matchmaker flies to visit clients and enters their homes? None. For the females reading, this should provide tremendous security and comfort knowing just how extensive the Linx vetting process is of our premier clientele.

So without further ado, our VIP gentleman is a savvy, handsome, successful, and clean-cut Caucasian gentleman. He is a youthful 48-year old and based in a bucolic, private golf course community nestled within the rolling hills of Orange County just a few miles away from the beach. Born and raised in Denver, he maintains a very loving relationship with his entire family including his parents as well as his 3 brothers and 3 sisters, all of whom still reside in CO. 

Physically, our client stands at 5’9”, has brown hair with flecks of grey, piercing blue eyes, sun-kissed tan skin, and a trim physique. His smile is bright and white, adorned with dimples, and his sense of style is relaxed, yet put together when not at work, and wears a tailored suit and tie for his job. Family, balance, stability, faith, and fun are some of the cornerstones of his life.

 

This candidate is the sort of man whom you can rely on. He’s incredibly confident, yet this confidence is tempered with an easygoing, fun-loving personality. He starts his day bright and early with his two beautiful daughters ages 9 and 11 years old over breakfast, giggles, and homework – both are straight-A students and love school! Once they are safe and off to school, he boards a plane for a short flight to Santa Monica where he morphs from “devoted, cool Dad” into “Executive” – the President of an investment management firm.

 

He’s been with this Tier 1 firm for over a decade and prides himself on running a very well-oiled machine that is grounded in the right processes and hiring of good people – all skills that he built over a lifetime of experience. Come 4:30pm, he’s heading back to the plane to be at home with the girls for a healthy and delicious dinner together.

 

Traditional, down to earth, and a Colorado boy at heart, our client relishes in any opportunity to be outside. He loves golf, skiing, fresh water fishing, hiking, the beach, warm weather, dining, his close circle of buddies, fast cars, and good red wine – pinot noir being a favorite.

You will find him to be extremely consistent, organized, and creative too! He designed and built his custom French-style home and would absolutely love to embark on a series of other real estate adventures with his dream woman scouting the properties and building from the ground up. To him, the process was very rewarding and finding a woman with an aesthetic flair would be the yin to his yang.

 

One of his huge passions is travel! He’s been all over Europe, to Argentina, regularly goes to Hawaii and loves islands in general (BVIs, US Virgin Islands, French Polynesia, Mykonos, Santorini), and Australia. Finding a match who would jump at the chance to travel with her dream man would be the icing on the cake!

Our client has experienced and witnessed some of the greatest joys and sadness of life. In 2017, he lost his extremely beautiful wife to a long, multi-year battle with breast cancer. Out of the darkness came a huge appreciation of commitment, being a loyal husband, being married, and being a devoted family man.

 

He’s had sufficient time to mourn such a huge loss and while he understands she will never be replaced, his heart, soul, and life have created the balance and room for someone extraordinary and very special to enter it. The Linx ladies spent considerable time with him recently and chatted at length with him in his beautiful, bright home about what he needs in a match. One thing that is very clear is that the single life is not for him!

 

His best suited match is between the ages of 28-40, Caucasian, Mixed race, or Latina, and with a natural beauty about her. She’s slender, with medium to long hair, a great smile, and a chic sense of style. She needs to be easygoing, patient, possessing of a sunny disposition, and to appreciate the simple things in life. While she might have a career of her own, this is not a requirement of our client. He’d welcome the opportunity to have his match be in charge of the home and family – yet she could easily have a side career if desired.

If you or anyone you know might make a wonderful match for our dream bachelor, please do not hesitate to contact Amy Andersen at: amy@linxdating.com.  There are absolutely NO FEES involved for qualifying candidates.

Thank you and let’s get this great guy successfully paired up! Happy Spring!

Remembering Why I Do This…

This year is off to a phenomenal start with so many couples in committed relationships. Today, I just received an email from my 60-something male client about his lovely Linx match and their recent engagement!

They both came out of very challenging divorces and the process shattered their respective self-confidences and frankly their hopes of ever finding love again. Yet, these two people believed in me, and this incredible process, enough to sign on and allow me to do what I do best – work my magic!

They each had a couple of introductions and then met one another pretty early in the process of our matchmaking lifecycle.

Exactly one year from their first date in Silicon Valley, they got engaged at a romantic restaurant in Europe. His email sharing the joyous news today brought tears to my eyes. THIS is exactly why I do this. I am very grateful and so humbled to get to change so many lives.

“I am writing to report to you some exciting news:  We are engaged to be married! We took a trip to Europe over the New Year’s holiday and I proposed to her in a romantic cafe! 

As you know, we met about a year ago and have come to realize how well we connect at every level. She is a lovely human being with a big heart, along with amazing intellect, worldliness and curiosity! We are the best travel partners! 

Most importantly, we are deeply in love, full of mutual respect and admiration! I have never felt about anyone like I do about her! Every moment has been wonderful, despite the baggage and issues we both bring to the relationship. Being with her makes everything easier! There is a lot of mutual support!

We are looking forward to many years of love and happiness together!

P.S. Just like you said, it’s a marathon, not a sprint. But so worth it!” 

Why stay on the giant hamster wheel of volume dating to endure more nights of swiping to meet a match?

Have you considered working with a matchmaker?  One of the biggest value adds is meeting people who not only are extremely exceptional by nature but who have been vetted.

Vetting in today’s era of modern dating is essential.  Anyone in the dating market should watch the recent series on E! about John Meehan and Debra Newell, as it should give EVERYONE pause about apps and online dating.

Without a shadow of doubt, hire a professional who’s not only the best in the industry but has earned her stripes being in business for 16 years!

Email me: amy@linxdating.com to learn more

6 Signs He’s Boyfriend Material

During the first stages of dating, it’s tough to know if your current date situation is worthy of a more in depth investment—with your time and your emotions. Here are 6 telltale signs that the one you’re seeing has the stuff that boyfriends are made of.

 

1. He remembers the little things.

Men who are genuinely interested keep track of information that is specific to you—your favorite movies, foods you dislike, places you want to see. Though they may not appear actively engaged, you’d be surprised with how many details they’re absorbing.

 

Here’s what it looks like: He knows you get cold—even when it’s 70 degrees outside. He will make sure you know where to find a blanket or he’ll set aside his favorite sweatshirt or oversized sweater just for you.

 

2. His values his family.

Staying connected with the parents and siblings reveals that he’s able to maintain relationships with the ones who matter most. Even if drama lingers at home, he has a way of seeing the bigger picture. A guy who prioritizes his family will be more likely to invest in a family of his own and sustain a relationship with you through for the long haul.

 

Here’s what it looks like: He talks about his sister’s upcoming visit…and hopes you will be available to meet her.

 

3. He has excellent follow though.

If he says he will call, he does. He doesn’t just talk about plans; he actually makes them. If he’s serious, you won’t need to push or prod to see action; he’s happy to orchestrate gestures—big and small—to keep things interesting.

 

Here’s what it looks like: When my client’s date had to fly out for work travel, my client said he would pick her up when she returned. Unfortunately, the date’s plane was delayed. Despite an 11:30 p.m. arrival, he was there to drive her home.

 

4. He puts you first.

There is nothing more telling about a man’s intentions than the way he prioritizes your needs over his. We’re not talking about a man doormat; we are talking about someone who is committed to ensuring that his date is comfortable and happy.

 

Here’s what it looks like: My friend felt ill at a basketball game with her date. Instead of asking her to stay till half time or getting annoyed about losing out on the great seats, he found her some Advil and quickly escorted her home. The next day he called to check on her.

 

5. He communicates with you often.

Despite his busy schedule, he always makes time to check in. It’s not the length of the message that counts; it’s the frequency. You might get a text, a phone call, or even a social media nod. Whatever it is, you won’t be left wondering if or when you’ll hear from him.

 

Here’s what it looks like: After two weeks my friend’s date left for international work travel. Between the time changes and the work load, she didn’t think she would hear from him for days. She was pleasantly surprised when he bought a new sim card and called her when he checked into his hotel.

 

6. He’s interested in growing and evolving.

He realizes that he’s a work in progress and wants to better himself. If he’s aware of his faults and interested in working them out, you’ll save yourself the un-winnable battle of trying to change someone. Openness about his desire to grow and change can be an opportunity that brings you closer together.

 

Here’s what it looks like: When my client first started dating in the wake of a painful divorce, he felt aloof and noncommittal. When he first met his girlfriend, he wasn’t sure how much to divulge about his past. Knowing that a lack of communication caused havoc in his first marriage, my client opted for transparency. He realized that for true intimacy to exist, he needed to experience vulnerability. His openness strengthened their bond and left both my client and his now girlfriend feeling secure about their relationship.