Silicon Valley Culture

4 Easy Techniques for Dealing with Anxiety During COVID-19 and a Message from Linx Founder

Robin Farmanfarmaian is a professional speaker, entrepreneur, and angel investor, focusing on cutting-edge healthcare and biotech companies poised to impact 100M patients. She put together this excellent 5 minute video to provide 4 powerful techniques to help cope with anxiety during uncertain times. We want to empower you all with the skills necessary to feel mentally strong during these challenging times in our world.

I want all readers to know that if you are feeling scared, isolated, and very alone- please reach out to me. I am here to talk to you in a loving and non-judgmental way and will do so happily anytime. You can email me personally at: amy@linxdating.com.

Furthermore, if anyone is reading this and is paralyzed by the anxiety brought on by losing a job and not being able to provide for yourself and/or your family and cannot put food on the table, I will try to help you to the best of my abilities. This is not a time to feel embarrassed or ashamed. It is a time to remember we are ALL HUMAN and in this together.

Stay healthy, strong, and well.

Warmly,

Amy Andersen

2020 is off with a Bang!

Hi All,

Happy New Years! I don’t recall a time in running Linx for 16+ years now where it has been *this* busy. My days as a matchmaker are typically filled with fielding hundreds on inbound inquiries about joining Linx, screening prospects, meeting up with clients for date and general life de-brief sessions, creating matchmaking magic, and attending events as we hunt for singles. 😉 Rough life I know…. Last night the Linx ladies attended a glitzy art event put on by SF MOMA in San Francisco. We saw clients there, Linx couples even sipping champagne, rubbed shoulders with socialites, and searched the halls for attractive men and women. While many were married, we did manage to find a handful who will be fantastic additions to the Linx network. Our ice breaker is simple, “Are you single?” 

Outside of glittery events recruiting this week, we met with a beautiful young lady who flew up to meet us from Southern California. Although she’s in her early 20’s, it is obvious she is ready for love and even put work on hold to take a day off traveling to meet with us. She emailed me the next day sharing how much we impressed her and unbeknownst to me, posted a sparkling review on Yelp and agreed I could publish her kind testimonial here for you all to read.

One thing I would like to mention is often women who are 50+ email me sharing they get the impression Linx only works with 20’s and 30’s. This couldn’t be farther from the truth. In fact, we represent clients of all ages from 20’s to 70’s and love working with 50+ as they often truly have a firm command of “who they are” and “what they want” in a match. Many of our exclusive and married couples are 50+

Here is our new member’s testimonial…

“I’m not one to typically write reviews, however, I am so beyond IMPRESSED by Amy and her assistant Talia that I felt compelled to share my POSITIVE experience with Linx!

Background:
I’m in my early 20s and I have had no issues with finding dates. I go on 2-3 dates a week on average. However quantity does not equal quality: I’ve had an extremely tough time finding like-minded people who want commitment. About a month ago, I learned about matchmaking services. I researched and applied to almost every matchmaking site I could find.

My review:
From the first email Amy sent me, she set herself and her business apart from all the rest! She personally responds to each and every inquiry with great attention to detail, professionalism and poise. She even answered a few questions I had while she was on her holiday vacation in December! That made it so obvious that she CARES. She truly and deeply cares about the quality of service she provides. While other services treated me like basic inventory, only getting to know me at surface level and pressured me for their own lucrative gain, Amy delved into getting to know my character, personality, and my values without any added pressure or preconceived commitment. That’s when I knew I could TRUST Linx with this important aspect of my life.

Amy was also the ONLY matchmaker that set a side time for an in-person meeting. The meeting was originally only supposed to be about 20-30 minutes, Amy and her assistant Talia gave me over an hour of their time! From the moment I walked into their office, Linx welcomed me with open arms and reassured me that I was in good hands! Conversing with the gorgeous ladies at Linx was like chatting with my best and most trusted girlfriends!

If you’re looking to invest in your dating life, Linx is the way to go! People don’t remember what others say as much as they remember how people make them feel. Amy and Talia made me feel significant and important. In my personal experience, other matchmakers market themselves as high-end services, but Linx is the only service whose brand identity is truly luxurious through and through. From their beautifully crafted and easy-to-navigate interface of their website, the personal attention provided by Amy and Talia, to their pristine and warmly decorated office in Silicon Valley…Linx provides prestigious quality, attention to detail, and a service that goes beyond expectations!

This is my personal thank you to Linx, I’m so excited for this journey with you!

***Disclaimer: I was NOT compensated, encouraged, or expected to write this review, this is my genuine, personal, transparent and authentic opinion about this WONDERFUL business. I chose to write a review anonymously for the sole purpose of maintaining my personal privacy.”

Have you ever believed that you were preordained to meet your soulmate?

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Have you ever believed that you were preordained to meet your soulmate?  

In Jewish culture, the word Bashert (or beshert; Yiddish: באַשערט) means “destiny”.  I had never heard of this word until a lovely woman that I matched to her beau explained it in full color to me. 

She explained that when two predestined souls find one another in their lifetimethey have met the “Beshert.”

Upon hearing this, she understood intuitively and knew deep down in her heart that this is what she would wait for…

Over the course of her twenties and thirties there would be several marriage proposals, however, she never experienced ‘the feeling’ that she was in the presence of her “Beshert” and so she waited… Before falling asleep at night she would visualize that when in the presence of her soul partner she would recognize him instantly… additionally, whenever she saw a happy couple she would be reminded of this deep connection and send “him” love from her heart chakra. She knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that when the time was right he would appear in her life.

In the interim, she started seeing a skilled therapist who helped her clear the pathway for meeting her Beshert. The therapist recommended that she take off six months of dating to examine her patterns, blocks, etc so that she would be the best version of herself and be ready for “him.” That Christmas, (and five and half months into her dating sabbatical) she experienced a deep loneliness like something was missing. She texted her therapist that she KNEW this would be the last Christmas that she spent without her life partner. 

She was committed to expanding her world and began Googling ways to connect with eligible men and found Linx Dating in Silicon Valley. She submitted her information like many women do in the hopes of meeting their match and was paired to a wonderful man shortly thereafter. She shares that she has never felt this way about anyone, the way she feels about him.

From their first conversation, there was an understood mutual connection and then when they met in person, it was this total feeling of familiarity, ease, fun, and attraction. This particular couple started their Linx match based on establishing a strong foundation of friendship. Multiple dates, many weekends, shared meals, walks, talks, and only escalating to holding hands for the first many months.

After a solid friendship had developed rooted in trust, integrity, and a lot of laughter, they were ready to deepen their relationship and become monogamous and romantic. They continue to fall deeper in love every day and consider this one of their greatest journeys… and they both agree that the connection that they share was worth the wait. 

Life works in all sorts of unexpected ways and every day is a gift for which to be grateful. According to her therapist, I became part of the Bershert process when she contacted Linx Dating. It’s been an honor and my pleasure to help two incredible people find each other and be each other’s Bershert.

For those interested, Dr. Judith F. Chusid, has worked with over 48 couples on finding their “bashert”. She is a relationship specialist and performance coach on the East Coast. Look for her book coming out next month on Amazon titled: Success Is An Inside JobStop Playing Small ~ Overcome Fear of Success ~ Live in Your Potential (Tune into Your Passion-Do What You Love – Follow Your Bliss) and in 2020 look for Success Is An Inside Job: Stop Choosing the Wrong Person ~ Overcome Unhealthy Choices ~ Connect with Your Bershert You can contact her at jchusid@consultjfc.com or (212) 463-0080 to learn more. 

Event of the year…..March 5th…!

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The Best of Silicon Valley 2019 Party brings to life the January & February “Best of Silicon Valley” issue!
Party the night away at the Rosewood Sand Hill Hotel with fabulous chef prepared foods, live music, amazing cocktails, and mingle with the Valley’s most desirable movers and shakers.
This event supports the Junior League of Palo Alto, Mid-Peninsula and will be a great way to meet like-minded people, while supporting a wonderful cause. This is not a Linx Dating event, instead Modern Luxury’s premier party of the year.
Linx will be in attendance, so please come say hi and toast to good people, positive energy, and new connections. Need a little dating advice or want to talk to me about matchmaking, just ask me there. Happy to chat discreetly.

When: Tuesday, March 5, 2019 | 6:00-8:30 pm

Where: The Rosewood Sand Hill Hotel | Menlo Park, CA, complimentary valet

Cocktail Attire, dress and look your best. Ladies bring a wrap or jacket as guests will be spilling over onto the lawn outside and the evening hours can get very chilly.

Tickets are only $85.00 and can be purchased here ⬇️:

 

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/best-of-silicon-valley-2019-tickets-57056277863

 

Event partners include:

Alexander’s Steakhouse
Blackened Whiskey
Cetrella Restaurant
La Mienne
Puesto
Sonoma Valley Wines
Stephen Silver Fine Jewelry
WhistlePig Whiskey

 

Announcing our latest VIP search | Looking for single women ages 25-36

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Our bachelor is a fun yet easy-going 37-year-old Indian American gentleman who stands 5’8”, has a slim/fit build, medium length black hair, brown eyes, a contagious smile, and stylish look. A lifelong athlete, he keeps fit with a regular combination of workouts at the gym and battles with the club tennis pro on the hard court.

Our client resides in Texas and has a sister who is married with two children in Bay Area whom he sees often.  He is very open to a match who resides either in the Bay Area or Texas.

Raised by two immigrant parents, he has high integrity and has good manners (yes, he opens doors), and naturally leads…but he enjoys when a woman takes the lead from time to time as well as he sees relationships as partnerships.  Professionally, this candidate is a portfolio manager for a successful hedge fund. An opportunistic entrepreneur at heart, he started his own real estate company during the global financial crisis to purchase and fix-up foreclosed homes and rent them out, later selling them for a profit.

Outside of his demanding career, he has a deep curiosity and interest in learning and trying new things. He has been to all of the planet’s continents except Antarctica and he loves going to new places, seeing new things and immersing himself in local culture. Despite his ambition and high intensity work environment, he tries not to take anything too seriously. Instead he likes to focus on living life to the fullest, being happy, building meaningful relationships and making the world a better place. I think you will find him to be a great guy, fun, well rounded, and most importantly, ready for commitment.

His best suited match is between the ages 25-36.  She could be any ethnicity but our client prefers someone with a real cultural heritage she is proud of! He responds best to feminine women who take pride in maintaining her health through fitness and enjoying dressing up.

His ideal match is social, independent, family-centric, nurturing, confident, mature, secure about herself, a true partner (as opposed to a dependent) and ready for a no games, no drama amazing relationship!  If you or anyone you know might make a nice match for our newest bachelor, please email our founder, Amy, at: amy@linxdating.com

 

Seeking Bay Area Single Women and Men in Tech to Star in a Film Documentary ….

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Linx has been approached about being the centerpiece of a film documentary produced by a leading renowned filmmaker.

 

Designed to be an open, honest, tasteful, and intellectual sociological snapshot of life and love in Silicon Valley, the film will follow the journey of two or three Linx members working in technology (premium or passive clients) as they navigate the often-challenging waters of the local dating scene.

For Linx – and for the lucky participants – the scope and potential of this proposed project is unbelievably exciting.

 

Given the impeccable journalistic standards of the project involved, we are seeking current (or new) members (or those who want to be a member!) who are willing to open their lives to the filmmaker, and who are comfortable being fully identified and filmed for the documentary.

 

This is an incredible invitation to market yourself to the entire world in one fell swoop. Imagine having the world as your stage? Forget swiping through dating apps and cycling through online dating sites; this is much grander and elite in scale.

 

For anyone who has been considering Linx but hasn’t fully committed to being a client, this is truly a once-in-a-lifetime chance to change the course of your journey.

 

Men and women alike will be considered as subjects for this piece, but timing and being in the tech industry is important.

 

It’s both humbling and exciting to receive this sort of recognition as a company that doesn’t advertise or have a PR firm; our reputation and your good word-of-mouth are everything in this business, and it is heartening to continue getting such strong and positive feedback from our clients.

 

We love working with all of you, and feel privileged to be able to help facilitate some of the most lasting and meaningful relationships in your lives. The number of recent exclusive couples, proposals, weddings, and Linx babies en route this coming fall and winter has been absolutely overwhelming, so we must be doing something right. 😉

 

If you or someone you know might be interested in exploring this possibility, please contact me amy@linxdating.com immediately for more information and next step details. Do not let this exceptional opportunity slip away!

 

 

 

Here’s How to Escape the Friend Zone

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The friend zone—it is the place you’ll end up if your romantic interest thinks you’re nice, but isn’t attracted to you romantically. Despite your best attempts to show your “friend” how great being in a relationship could be, your “friend” just isn’t reciprocating. Maybe one or more of the following has happened to you:

  • A romantic prospect introduces you to other people, saying “This is my FRIEND…”
  • A romantic prospect refers to you as a “brother” or “sister”- perhaps after there was some sort of physical contact (i.e., a brief make-out that leads to them pushing you away…saying “I feel like you’re my sister/brother.” 😦
  • You’ve made obvious advances that were ignored

Shifting interest from “just friends” to something more is difficult, but not impossible. If you are perpetually finding yourself in the friend zone, consider these three principles and a few tips on how best to implement them.

  1. The Principle of Least Interest: The member of a relationship who cares least about it is often more desirable and powerful. In other words, letting go of your intense desire to be in the relationship is more likely to boost your chances of ending up in one. It sounds counterintuitive, but it’s the same principle that explains why so many of us have played ‘hard to get’. Feigning a lack of interest can make oneself more desirable.

So what can you do? Entertain other options.

Showing interest in others demonstrates that you aren’t willing to forego other options for someone who isn’t feeling the same way about you. In other words, you’re not going to sit and wait for someone to start being interested in you. Though not seeming too eager can be hard when you really do like someone, actively meeting other people and keeping your options open will help you regain some of the power that you lost while pursuing a relatively disinterested person.

  1. The Principle of Scarcity: A close cousin of Principle #1… Because we value things that are scarce more than we value the things that are abundant, it’s in your best interest to remain somewhat unavailable. When you are always available, you’re depriving your partner of an opportunity to win you over and understand just how valuable your time is.

So what can you do? Fill up your social calendar.

Getting busy will give your love interest an opportunity to miss you. Committing yourself to other activities—and refusing to cancel them—is a great way to signal that your time and energy are valuable.

  1. The Ben Franklin Effect: This psychological phenomenon explains why people have better feelings towards the people for whom they do favors. In practice, this means that you are the favor asker instead of the favor doer.

So what can you do? Ask for small favors that can lead to spending time together.

Figure out a way for her to help you out and also to spend time with you. If your apartment feels a little stale, ask her to help you redecorate. If you need a weekend away, ask her to watch the dog; find a way for her to help you out. Instead of you driving to their home every day after work, ask them to drive to you.

How to Date with Asperger’s…

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Dating is challenging for everyone, but for those with Asperger’s, the dating dance seems more like a series of spastic, rhythm-less movements. Matthew Rozsa, a successful journalist with Asperger’s described his personal experience eloquently: “If life in a society is a game (and make no mistake about it, it is), having Asperger’s forces you to play while learning two-thirds of the rules as you go along, even as everyone else knows them instinctively … and assumes you do too.”

Unlike their neurotypical (NT) counterparts, people with Asperger’s struggle to understand nuance or things that aren’t to be taken literally. Dating, especially, with all the flirting and mixed messages makes courtship exceptionally difficult. Though intensive, personalized coaching is the best way to improve dating success. Until you are ready to take that step, try these five dating tips for better dating experiences.

  1. Focus on the Signals

The best way to determine if someone is interested is to watch for signals. Before speaking, most people communicate through body language. Proximity, hand gestures, and eye contact are all ways of communicating without saying a word. Not all signals carry the same strength, so it’s crucial to differentiate weak signals, which could indicate friendship, from strong signals, which could indicate romantic interest.

Weak signals include: saying hello, making infrequent eye contact

Strong signals: touching, asking for your phone number, getting very close, asking you many personal questions

Think of weak signals as springboards for you to mine for more information. For example, if you notice a woman across the room, but she decides to order a cocktail next to you, she is offering a weak, yet positive signal. If you initiate conversation with this woman and notice that she is asking questions about you, the signal is getting stronger.

  1. Keep the First Date Shorter

To de-pressurize the first date, try selecting a single event or activity as the date. With a time limit on social interaction, you can relax and focus on learning about your date. As you’ll be maintaining constant one-on-one contact in a public place, you run the risk of sensory overload. This level of distraction can take you out of a comfortable mind frame and spoil budding romantic feelings. A time limit on the first few dates will help guide you through the more uncertain parts of the dating process. As your relationship grows, you’ll be better equipped to negotiate how much time to spend with each other.

  1. Consider Being Open About Your Condition

A lot of people wonder if they should be open about their autism when they are first dating someone. According to sexologist Amy Marsh, an authentic, straightforward approach is best. “The best thing a former partner said to me was, ‘I have a limited capacity for emotional engagement.’” If you feel that your partner is giving you strong signals—and you feel similarly—opening up about your condition might not only help her know what to expect, but also prevent her from taking some of the emotional challenges personally.

  1. Listen More than You Speak

If you have a tendency to talk a lot, you need to remember the purpose of the date: You are trying to learn about a new person. If you find yourself talking incessantly on one subject for a prolonged period of time, you aren’t creating an opportunity to learn about your date. Prepare a few questions that cannot be answered with a ‘yes’ or ‘no’, and try your best to listen twice as much as you talk.

  1. Follow Up

If you aren’t sure about the signals you received during the date, and you’re interested in seeing your date again, you should certainly ask. If your date is unresponsive, she is probably not interested in seeing you again romantically. However; you can use this opportunity to learn more about her dating experience to improve. The best way to get answers is to create a safe space for her to be honest with you. You can leave her a voicemail or text and politely ask for feedback. After you make the request, you should not continue to contact her or ask her out on more dates.

Example: “Hi. I’m really happy you took the time to go out with me last week. I understand we might not be matched for dating, but I would really appreciate your feedback so I can improve. I think it’s really hard to read emotional cues and communicate about my feelings and any help you could give me would be immensely appreciated. Absolutely up to you and no pressure.”

How to Keep Him Interested

 

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After your second dinner date with a promising new guy, he invites you back to his place for a night cap. At his apartment, he’s very affectionate and asks you to stay over. You’re attracted to him and want to see him again, but you aren’t ready to get between the sheets quite yet. How do you reject his advances, keep him interested at the same time, and not upset him by being ‘a tease?’

In this age of modern romance, when single people can find their next booty call with a touch of their smartphone, it’s important to know how to show a guy you are interested without jumping into bed with them right away. Consider the strategies below to keep your new guy interested without going too far too fast:

  • Let him know that you need to head home since you have an early morning meeting but would love to see him again soon.
  • Innocently brush up against his shoulder or waist to let him know that you are interested in him physically.
  • Kissing can be deliciously delightful and the perfect solution to letting him know you’re digging him but ending it at that for the time being.
  • Tell him you have a strict policy of not sleeping with anyone unless you in are monogamous relationship. This is one of the biggest areas I see so many people goof on when dating one another. Too many times couples start sleeping together and because they are very attracted to one another and see one another all the time, the female assumes they are exclusive.
  • You are NOT exclusive unless you HAVE THE TALK. So have the talk and be a smart dater. For all you know, your partner is sleeping with a handful of other people- and frankly that’s not safe!
  • Plan ahead – create a compelling event that will require you to leave the date at a certain time.
  • Text him after you leave to let him know that you had a great time and look forward to seeing him again.

Differentiate yourself as the girl who doesn’t jump in the sack right away. You have standards and values and if he can’t appreciate you being a quality girl…his loss and your gain honey!

If you reject his advances and never hear from him again, he probably wasn’t interested in dating you in the first place. If he is seriously interested in dating you, he will be more than happy to wait for the relationship to turn physical.

Just remember to give him some encouragement, including flirty texts, verbal affirmations, and as much touch as you are comfortable doing at whatever stage you’re at with him.

Egg Freezing Part 2: When should I tell my partner?

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There’s a shift in every woman’s life when they go from doing everything in their power to prevent pregnancy to desperately trying to preserve and fertilize their eggs before time runs out. As discussed in last month’s blog post, egg freezing is becoming a popular choice for women who want to take their fertility into their own hands on their own timeline. Many women who have frozen their eggs report feeling more confident and at ease when dating, but when is the best time to let your date know that your eggs are on ice?

Don’t blurt it out on every first date

Egg freezing is a new concept, so many men, especially those who don’t live in urban centers, are completely clueless about it. Some women in their late 30s and 40s reported feeling the need to tell every man they meet that they are still able to have children since they have frozen their eggs, but the men we surveyed said that sharing this in the first few dates is not necessary and can ruin the mood. You don’t want every first date to turn into a medical lecture.

Share it with someone you care about

Freezing your eggs is a big decision you have made, or are thinking about making, for yourself. The procedure takes a lot of time, energy and money, and speaks volumes about how much you value having the option to have your own children. This is a beautiful gift you can give to a loving, committed partner when the time is right. Most of the men we surveyed said that egg freezing is a smart choice that they respect and admire. It can give couples the time they need to figure out if they are meant to be or not before rushing into having children.

Wait until the topic of children comes up

Learning about your partners’ views on having children can be an immediate deal breaker or can bring you closer together. If you have frozen, or are considering freezing your eggs, having children is likely very important to you. If you want kids and your partner doesn’t, you should have the breakup conversation instead of the egg freezing conversation. People very rarely change their minds about wanting to have kids. If he also wants kids, this is the perfect time to tell him that you’ve frozen your eggs. He will probably be thrilled to share in your commitment to having a family.

Tread lightly

Have a plan before the topic comes up and understand what you want out of the conversation. Carefully explain to your partner why you are considering or have already frozen your eggs. Chances are your partner knows little to nothing about egg freezing and will have a lot of questions. Several men have reported feeling threatened by knowing that their partner can have children whenever and with whomever they choose. Communicate gently and be aware of his feelings.

The timing and delivery of this personal information will vary by relationship, but we felt compelled to share some general guidelines since this question has come up a lot recently. Whether you are thinking about freezing or have frozen your eggs, it is a big decision that you should share with your partner when the time is right.