matchmaker to the stars

Former American Diplomat seeks his traditional match 25-35 years old

 

iStock-697044734 copy.jpgWe are thrilled to announce a new search for our international bachelor. Our client is a true renaissance man. He’s a 38-year-old 6ft former Ivy League football player with a Yugoslavian mother and African American father.  He is a mix between Jason Bourne and Marty Khan and has served as a Counterintelligence Officer in the US military, been an American Diplomat, and now works as an international management consultant for a top 5 firm in the Mid East.

He combines a Hollywood smile and a movie star’s charisma with an endless supply of energy and an engineer’s intellectual curiosity.  The man is polished, erudite, and displays the manners and global savvy of the experienced diplomat he is.  Although high strung, he is gregarious, engaging, and the kind of guy that makes toddlers smile and giggle when he greets them (he once worked as a kindergarten teacher in his early 20s).

He’s handsome with a mischievous aurora and is a true globetrotter that has been to over 117 countries.  In addition to being an avid tennis enthusiastic he provides tutoring and mentorship to inner-city kids wanting to attend elite schools.
Currently based in a booming Middle East hub with an amazing expatriate package that includes ½ a floor at a five-star hotel, household staff, driver, and private school for the kiddies when you have them. After serving his country in several global hotspots he is now ready to settle down and be the family man that he always wanted to be.  He is a traditionalist and is comfortable being the breadwinner for the family but is also open to a careerist partner.

His ideal match is between the ages of 25-35, open on her heritage, although leans towards exotic, in shape, and with feminine curves. She is engaging, interesting, humble, loyal, an optimistic by nature, and prefers a traditional man. As our client is current based in the Middle East, this candidate needs to be open to travel and possible relocation.

If you or anyone you know might make a great fit for this gentleman, please email Amy directly at: amy@linxdating.com Thank you!

Is your relationship cheat-proof? Research reveals the most common reasons partners stray

 

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After polling over 100,000 people, Chrisanna Northrup published extensive research on infidelity in her book The Normal Bar. Her findings explored not only the prevalence of cheating, but also perhaps more interestingly, she learned the situations that were most likely to encourage committed partners to stray.

 

  1. The Business Trip

For frequent travelers, life on the road comes with loneliness and stress—two circumstances that make meeting a beautiful stranger a welcome distraction.

36% of men and 13% of women admitted to cheating on a business trip. Respondents claimed that the sexual liaison was just too enticing to pass up, even if they had a robust sex life at home. Researchers concluded that the infidelity was related to sex, but also with the thrill of being wanted sexually and being able to engage and get away with it.

How long into a relationship is the business affair most likely to happen? 6-9 years.

 

  1. An ex

Even though the relationship maybe over, the feelings can still exist—especially for women. 32% of women admitted to having a fling with an ex or old interest, compared to 21% of men. Those who cheated with an ex reported a satisfying sex life at home; however, the forbidden nature of sleeping with someone who still holds emotional connectivity proved tempting.

How long into a relationship is an ex most likely to tempt? 2-5 years.

 

  1. Boredom in the bedroom

A mundane sex life is a big reason men and women entertain the idea of getting their needs meet elsewhere. 71% of men and 49% of women cheated after claiming boredom in the bedroom. Often times, people cheat because they are ashamed of their bedroom preferences. In an effort to avoid the conversation, people will suppress their desire and ultimately engage in an affair later to indulge it or, unfairly, project the shame onto their partner.

 

  1. Revenge infidelity

After a partner cheated, 9% of men and 14% of women admitted to cheating for revenge.

 

  1. An inability to be monogamous

Despite entering a committed relationship, many people just can’t dismiss the urge to cheat. 46% of men and 19% of women who strayed and were asked why said, “I just can’t help myself.”

 

But are there reasons people cheat that are beyond their control?

 

We are ultimately responsible for our decisions, but some factors can certainly cloud our better judgment. After meeting someone interesting and attractive, the brain produces a surge of dopamine. The dopamine rush triggers an intense, addictive euphoria—a euphoria that leaves us begging for more, even if it’s outside of the confines of our relationship.

 

There could also be a genetic propensity for cheating. In one study,  researchers surveyed 294 participants and discovered that those who had at least one parent cheat were twice as likely to cheat as the participants who had parents who maintained committed relationships.

 

Is there hope after infidelity?

 

Ironically, affairs don’t necessarily indicate a broken marriage. Although difficult, one of the biggest hurdles to getting the relationship back on track is working through the “victim/perpetrator” mentality. According to Dr. Joe Kurt, Ph.D., LMSW, the betrayed partner can start thinking that because he or she was cheated on, it’s up to the cheater to make everything right again. This blame-focused approach will ultimately sabotage any chance at reconciliation.

 

The best hope for a couple is to talk through the cheating—both the cheater’s experience and the injured partner’s response—in the presence of a counselor or therapist. Together, they can figure out the best ways to rebuild trust and demonstrate transparency.

Dreaming about Lake Como….Meet our Latest VIP!

 

Lake-Como-Linx-Header.jpgWe are pleased to announce a new VIP search. Our client is in his early 50’s, athletic, 6’1″ and 187 pounds – a European gentleman born and raised in France who has spent his entire adult life in the US. Our client believes in developing and pursuing passions in life, and feels he is finally very privileged to do so. On the professional front, after years in venture capital, he became a successful angel investor supporting entrepreneurs in building their dream companies. He now has the ability to help others who are not as privileged to access opportunities such a supplemental education and athletic activities for underprivileged kids.

Outside of his career, our client is a wanderlust who enjoys discovering more of the planet every year. In 2016 and 2017, this bachelor traveled to Patagonia in Argentina, The Galapagos, Peru, The Serengeti in Tanzania, Tokyo, Kyoto, Nara and Osaka in Japan, Tulum in Mexico, Capri and Lake Como in Italy, and soon to Spain, and back to Japan at the end of the year! Talk about a love of travel!

He has developed a special interest in Japan after six years in a traditional martial art school, and an interest in Zen, Japanese cuisine, and the current modernization of capital markets in that country. With a very progressive social conscience, he perceives himself as a citizen of the world.

He would like to find a partner to share some passions with, and possibly explore and develop new ones in common. Of Northern Italian descent, he would love to own a house overlooking Lake Como one day. Currently, he resides in the San Francisco Bay Area most of the time, and at a second home in Southern California in Northern San Diego County.

His best suited match is between the ages of 35 and 45. She is 5’5”+ , physically fit, with beautiful soulful eyes, and presents herself in a classy, elegant fashion. At her core, she is kind and compassionate, smart, sophisticated, passionate, loving, and has her own robust, dynamic life outside of a relationship with a man. She appreciates a strong, alpha male and recognizes that some of the best relationships are where men and women each bring their own unique characteristics to the relationship.

Notable adjectives to best describe her would be: nurturing, highly feminine, and not aggressive or competitive with her partner. She must be accepting and loving towards all creatures including a love of animals and children. Friends might comment how she exhibits a soft energy around them and is filled with light, love, acceptance, and warmth.

If you or anyone you might know could qualify as a candidate to meet this extraordinary European VIP, please email our founder, Amy, at amy@linxdating.com

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Why you should break your dating inertia

In conversations with countless individuals, we have discovered that people assume that matchmaking is about arranging marriages; this really isn’t true. For some people, marriage is definitely the next step in their dating lives, but for many of our clients this process is simply about learning how to move forward.

At Linx, matchmaking is about helping your break your dating inertia. Our goal is to simply help you move forward and get into the serious, lasting relationship you deserve.

One of the great advantages of working with a matchmaker is that we have the ability to help avoid the triggers and landmines of your past relationships when providing you with new introductions. We can best position you for success by pairing you with others who understand – or even share – your particular dating difficulties.

Need someone who isn’t threatened by your success, grad degree, identifiable famous last name, or unusual hobbies….look no further. Want someone else who has been in a serious committed relationship or previous marriage and “gets it?” We can actually help with all of that. In fact, it’s part of our job.

If you a prospective client or curious to see if you might make a match for some of our current clients, take a look at some of our select male client bios here and select female clients bios. Email our founder, Amy, and tell her a little bit about yourself amy@linxdating.com

 

Southern California VIP Bachelor Seeks Dream Match

We are thrilled to announce a new search for a VIP in Southern California. Our bachelor is a high energy and intelligent mid-50’s Caucasian gentleman who is 5’10”, 180 pounds and is based in Manhattan Beach. He is passionate, expressive and is deeply committed to living life fully! He is an entrepreneur, currently owning and running 3 businesses and is very involved with children related philanthropy.  He was born in London, grew up in New York, and has lived in San Francisco, San Diego, and loves the Southern California lifestyle. He received his BA from Amherst College and his MBA from Stanford Business School.

His many interests and activities include hot yoga, Argentine Tango, supporting independent filmmakers, hiking, basketball, travel and dining. He loves art and music and regularly goes to museums, art and music festivals and concerts. He takes adult extension courses and likes to push himself outside of his comfort zone.

This candidate is a passionate and intense person who feels things deeply. He has a great and happy life and wants to share it with a partner. He is deeply committed to his 2 kids (ages 20 and 18) and they will always be a priority but given their ages and his work and philanthropy structure, he has the desire to put in the time and effort to have a committed long-term relationship.

Our bachelor responds best to feminine, stylish, and beautiful women who are between the ages of 35-55 years old and care about staying in shape. His match is social, intelligent, an excellent communicator, very affectionate, introspective, and independent. She gets what work life balance means and lives her life where flexibility and freedom are paramount. His perfect match would be based near Manhattan Beach yet our bachelor is very open to women residing in NYC, the Bay Area, or beyond.

If you or anyone you know might make a match for our dream VIP, please contact Amy right away: amy@linxdating.com

Meet Our Israeli Bachelor: Recruiting Women Ages 27-47

 

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We are excited to announce a new search. Our intellectual and funny 42-year old Israeli bachelor stands 5’9” with an athletic build, short brown hair, brown eyes, and a kind, warm smile. He has been an attorney for the last 17 years working exclusively with entrepreneurs, startups and venture capitalists.

He grew up in Israel and moved to the US about 9 years ago to get his LL.M degree at an Ivy League. Outside of work, he loves spending quality time with his two children (13 and 11 years old), honing his DJ skills, traveling, dining, attending concerts, and adventures near and far. This candidate has many facets to his personality.

At work, he dresses and acts like a serious corporate attorney, while with friends and family, he’s more casual, relaxed and just himself. Despite his ambitions and responsibilities, he enjoys taking it easy. He is both interested in succeeding in his career and creating a good, fun life for  himself and for those around him.

His best suited match is between the ages of 27-47 years old and of Caucasian, Asian, or Mixed race heritage.  She is feminine, sexy, and social. Our bachelor appreciates entrepreneurial woman who are independent, open-minded, smart, and with a great sense of humor intact. She should appreciate the outdoors, travel (everything from camping to five star accommodations), cooking, children, music, and fun!

If you or anyone you know might make a match for this bachelor client of ours, please email Amy: amy@linxdating.com and tell us a little bit about yourself.

 

What’s Happening in Silicon Valley & Beyond

Silicon Valley and the world is buzzing with last week’s FB acquisition of WhatsApp for 19BB! That’s right, 19BB – each founder is walking away with approximately 4BB. Talk about a nice payday.

WhatsApp has been around 5 years and is the most popular messaging app for smartphones. It is believed that the WhatsApp acquisition will secure Facebook’s already leading position in the crowded messaging world.1392860067000-GTY-470487009

Last week I had the pleasure of being treated to an amazing night at the exclusive and chic Battery in San Francisco by three amazing, awe-inspiring male clients. These guys all referred one another into Linx, were co-founders of a tech company together, and have had great experiences with Linx, choosing it as another strategic option in their arsenal of dating resources.

They commiserated about how the scene is tough for guys, that filtering online profiles is extremely time consuming, and how they are committed to making 2014 “their year” to each find the woman of his dreams. These good solid guys are late 20’s to early 30’s, each super fascinating.

I ran into a ton of familiar faces at The Battery – former and current clients, friends, and new connections. Definitely a who’s-who sort of establishment – folks having dinner, people drinking late into the night upstairs, playing cards, and encouraged not to talk about work…in fact, no photos are allowed (that’s right, not even “selfies”…man, I loathe that expression!), and the membership is curated to bring together like-minded influencers from all sorts of unique backgrounds – many not in tech. Computer use and business talk is discouraged in favor of discussions about the arts, current affairs, culture, and travel. 628x471 Photo: Ken Fulk, Inc.

The five-level, 58,000-square-foot club at 717 Battery Street is a very unique one-of-a-kind elite club-designed by Ken Fulk and with the most spectacular interior filled with modern art, sculptures, terraces, restaurants, a wine cellar, and much more. This impressive establishment is the creation of Michael and Xochi Birch. This cool couple sold the social networking site Bebo to AOL for $850 million in 2008 and later were inspired by the private social clubs of London as they conceptualized The Battery. I encourage you to tap your network of friends to see “who” might be members and ask a friend to check it out….

New Year Q & A with CEO of Linx Dating

New Years is right around the corner. Make 2014 YOUR Year to find the love of your life. I spend a lot of my days talking with prospects about Linx and answering questions about the business. Since there are so many inquiries coming in with 2014 on the horizon, I thought it would be helpful to post a basic Q & A about the Linx network.

Q: It sounds like you work mostly with men who need help dating, true? Can you generalize about your clientele and what they are looking for—long-term relationship, or something more casual?

A: Linx is an offline dating and social network created for the commitment-minded… professionals looking for a hookup or a quick fix are not our target and we have an extensive screening process for all candidates that weeds out those who are not “in it for the long haul.”

Though we do a lot of date coaching work with some of our clients to help them be successful in the early stages of dating (getting past date one, to date two, three, and so on), we are doing this to nurture budding relationships that, projecting ahead, could be perfect matches and ultimately marriage.

Of course, not all Linx clients are on exactly the same timeline, but all of them are seeking, and comfortable with, commitment.

Linx is one of the few matchmaking networks that represents BOTH men and women as clients and, depending on the type of membership, either or both will pay fees.

For example, we represent many females who are struggling as they try to locate a match for marriage. This typical female client is healthy inside and out, feminine, very well-educated (often Ivy League caliber), over-achieving, and has an impressive career. The dating background on such a candidate is usually binary – either (1) she has dated too many eligible, yet emotionally unavailable men, who cannot commit to her and has been repeatedly burned, so now it’s GAME ON, like RIGHT NOW; or (2) on the other extreme, she has not dated that much at all, is not really sure where to turn as she refuses to do online dating (or is highly skeptical of it), has zero interest in dating colleagues from work, and has severe time constraints. We work with all ages of women and represent many women who have been married before and have children (often children in their teens and even out of the house).

And, just like the women, my male clients also have it all going on! When people think Silicon Valley, they think all the men are like young Bill Gates clones running around with “coke bottle glasses” and pocket protectors….sort of like out of Revenge of the Nerds. My clients are anything but socially inept. Like any other guys out there, they have dated in varying degrees.

My typical male client has a graduate degree, a great job, exudes confidence, and now it’s all about finding the right woman. It’s like a light goes off in his head and there is no stopping him. This type of guy settles down and game playing is simply not in his DNA. Even if I gave him a guide to be a player like the schools for PUA (pick up artist), he wouldn’t know how to do it. Many of our male clients are very presentable, polished, and are perfectly social. We represent a lot of male clients at companies such as: GOOG, CSCO, FB, ORCL, Palantir, Box, AAPL, LNKD, eBAY (including lots of hot smaller VC backed start-ups) in the tech space and countless VCs on Sand Hill Road and savvy angel investors who remain pretty off the grid and are pretty private sorts of guys.

One common thread I see, from both my male and female clients, is that they have extraordinarily high standards in what they seek, and they absolutely should, when they come to a service such as Linx. No one is telling them to “settle.” But there is a difference between being discriminating and being picky – the latter connotes an attitude of being unproductively critical and not ever quite being satisfied.

More often than not, when clients first approach me, it is a “needle in a haystack” match that they want in terms of endless objective characteristics. I really work hard to determine what is MOST important to them and to go after those characteristics. For example, what if a woman says she won’t date a guy shorter than 6 feet tall and I manage to locate a man with every other important quality she wants and he is 5’ 10”? She is likely eliminating a huge portion of the population by not being flexible with that…

Not surprisingly, in Silicon Valley, my highly educated and analytical clientele often apply the same methodology to their dating that made them successful in their careers, and that does not always work because here we are dealing with matters of the heart.

Q: A lot of employers like Google strive to give their employees everything they need—food, entertainment, even massages—mostly so they’ll be happy working all the time and never leave. Does that make it more difficult for some to go out with a stranger and work for something—a kiss (or more) and maybe a second date? Since people work all the time, office romances are not unheard of. This happens in other businesses too, obviously, from Washington to Wall Street, but are there particular dangers, or advantages to the office romance here in Silicon Valley?

A: Well, with the kinds of perks that Google or Facebook or Palantir, for example, offer to employees, it is easy to see why an employee, on the margin, might stay at work rather than venture out. Google really started this trend a decade ago as the first startup company that tried to preserve a startup culture – like a fun, innovation playground – as the company grew, and that has become more of an expectation now amongst typical young talent qualified to work at these companies.

If you think about it, the culture at these companies for 20 and even early 30-somethings is not unalike the dorm experience at a top university – project teams bond over what they do all day… it’s more about living to work than it is about working to live, and so you do everything together. The movie “The Internship” might have been fiction and was probably a bit exaggerated but it was pretty much on target. With that in mind, it is not surprising that this culture (like college dorms) would lead to inter-office dating. When you have lots of smart, eligible people around that can empathize on each other’s current life mission, it is very attractive, casual, and convenient. At Facebook, for example, it is known to be very common.

All of that said, most companies, of course, frown upon their employees dating one another. And many of my women clients (and some men, too) tell me that they do not want to do this primarily because it could jeopardize how hard they have worked to get to where they have gotten at such young ages and thus harm their reputations – it often is not worth it. Others have even said “you have one shot” if you do this and it had better be “the one.” This statement is very akin to the clients we have at Stanford University GSB. Otherwise, you could get a reputation that sticks with you.

Reputation is everything and only you can control this. Once you start dipping the pen in the ink at work, the problem can be that people talk, gossip, and the spotlight can be on the person you’re dating and not what you are really meant to be focused on – which is work. So it can be a calculated risk.

Linx in Newsweek | Beware of Geeks Bearing Gifs

By: Sean Elder

It’s Saturday night at The Sea (“Home of the $57 halibut!”), which is perched on the border between Palo Alto and Mountain View, and anyone new here might think there’s a big gay scene in Silicon Valley. Guys outnumber women about five to one at this high-end restaurant tonight and many of the men are dining together. But they do not seem together in that sense: Most are looking or tapping intently at their Androids or iPhones – both are in equal evidence, given the restaurant’s proximity to both Google and Apple headquarters. The work never stops here, which in the high-octane world of high-tech start-ups is the same as saying the fun never stops: Work is fun in Silicon Valley. Unless your idea of fun is dating.

“The odds are good, but the goods are odd” is the lament of many single women here. Kate Greer, a Stanford grad who lived and dated in Silicon Valley for many years says, “I love to watch women who would have never looked at these guys in high school or college” suddenly circling the big fish in the tiny tech pond. “It’s sweet to watch [them] falling in love with the biggest nerd in the room – that guy who looks like that little chicken with the big glasses in the Foghorn Leghorn cartoons.”

Of the countless success stories in Silicon Valley none looms larger than Elon Musk: PayPal co-founder, electric car inventor, lunar travel entrepreneur. Director Jon Favreau says Musk was the model for Robert Downey’s Tony Stark in the Iron Man movies and the enigmatic South African certainly works and plays like a superhero, if not a movie star. According to a Bloomberg Businessweek profile he has had one vacation in four years, taking time out to divorce his second wife, the actress Talulah Riley, in August 2012. “I would like to allocate more time to dating,” Musk said before asking the reporter. “How much time does a woman want a week? Maybe 10 hours?”

The environment of many tech companies is still notoriously frat-like and not necessarily conducive to what most people consider grown-up mating rituals. “The culture at these companies for 20- and even early 30-somethings is not unlike the dorm experience at a top university,” says Amy Andersen, founder and CEO of Linx Dating Service in Menlo Park. “Project teams bond over what they do all day…. It’s more about living to work than it is about working to live, and so you do everything together.”

Andersen came to her calling after a disastrous date with a very eligible venture capitalist 10 years ago. When she asked her date why he was scoping out the other women in the place, he said he was looking for “the BBD” – the bigger, better deal. While you can’t necessarily teach people class, she does try to enlighten her clients (for a fee that ranges from $20,000 to $100,000) about proper dating behavior. Andersen recalls a 20-something coder at a gaming company with extreme social anxiety: She had to coach him on hugging, and she suggested a car service for his first date, rather than having him show up on the bike he rides to work.

Some liken the atmosphere, and the romances that blossom in it, to that of a film set – though with a much longer shoot. “There’s a sort of youthful exuberance in Silicon Valley,” says Greer. “The youthful exuberance is what makes you think you can do something out of nothing. To know that you can take code and make beautiful things that change the world, you have to have youthful exuberance. If you want to have a serious husband with a suit on, go marry a biz dev guy.”

The biggest challenge in the Silicon Valley dating game may lie in the personalities that dominate the field. Left-brain Spock types can’t so quickly channel their inner Bones and let loose with a barbaric yawp. “My highly educated and analytical clientele often apply the same methodology to their dating that made them successful in their careers,” says Andersen, “and that does not always work, because here we are dealing with matters of the heart.”

As more women become engineers, the dynamics of dating in Silicon Valley are bound to change. Adam Hertz, an engineer at Comcast, has “been off the market for a while,” but his kids, in their 20s, are in the demo: His son, who works at Google, met his partner at a SantaCon event in San Francisco. “They both work really hard,” he says. “Once they are together, they have to work at the relationship.” His daughter is in the next wave: She is in a program studying to be a “great software developer,” 70 hours a week. Her boyfriend is in the food business, delivering produce in the Bay Area’s booming restaurant business. “They never see each other at all.”
© Copyright 2013 IBT Media Inc. All Rights Reserved.

Fun Celebrity Matches by Linx!

TheNest.com (the sister site to The Knot for newlyweds) approached me to come up with the best matches for some of Hollywood’s hottest single celebs like Johnny Depp, Rihanna, etc. They choose a couple of my matches for the story on TheNest.com and the rest I thought I would put up here so you can read about some of my fun celeb match ideas and why!

Jessica Chastain

Although Chastain has said in the past that she doesn’t date actors, that doesn’t mean she wouldn’t. I chose Aaron Eckhart, who, like Chastain, seems more into his craft than fame and has proven his talent in indies like Thank You for Smoking and blockbusters like Batman, could be the exception to the red-headed starlet’s rule. Jessica is an actress of great depths and attended Juilliard, so I think Eckhart would make a strong match for her. With an old soul like Chastain, the age gap works in Eckhart’s favor, too (she’s 36 and he’s 45). Fun fact, they’re both Bay Area, CA natives (her Sacramento and him Cupertino). Pretty picture perfect next to one another too don’t you think? F118045250194E729915F3597E6FCA0E

Ryan Seacrest

Although Julianne Hough and Ryan Seacrest’s breakup seemed to catch even the love pros by surprise, I think Hollywood’s hardest working man needs someone a little older. Julianne Hough is 24 years old and Ryan is 38 years old. I would match him with January Jones, who’s 35, blond (which he seems to go for) and seems very classy. Come to think of it, Jones and Hough kind of look like they could be related…perhaps a good evolution in his dating. 2DB58AB4193540B7ADAAE21B1329B81D

Prince Harry

He needs someone who completely understands his royal obligations, is extremely poised, classy, and with an impeccable track record. She needs to have strong family values and be someone to shape Prince Harry into the marrying type versus the party boy image. A great match would be Charlotte Casiraghi who is 26 years old. This beauty is fourth in line to the throne of Monaco. Her maternal grandparents were Rainier III, Prince of Monaco, and Grace Kelly. She also is the official equestrian “ambassador” of Gucci. Prince Harry and Charlotte would not only share the similar royal family background, be close in age, but also a lovely common passion of all things equestrian. harrycharlotte

Katie Holmes

Katie needs to step out of the Hollywood scene for dating and date a strong leading man who is not only deep and intellectual but very cute (and frankly a better age compared to her ex Tom). Uber entrepreneur extraordinaire Jack Dorsey founder of Twitter and Square would make a great match for Katie. They both seem approachable and what is so nice is that there would always be tons to talk about considering they are in completely different industries. They’re also a good age- she’s 34 and he’s 36. She already has the child and most likely he would appreciate that biological pressure being removed so they can really enjoy getting to know one another. Certainly if they did have children together, their babies would be gorgeous and smart to boot! KatieJack

You can check out more matches here: http://ideas.thenest.com/love-and-sex-advice/sex-questions-advice/slideshows/fake-celebrity-couples.aspx?page=4

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