Linx Dating complaints

Matchmaker Updates

Dear Readers,

This week has been another super busy one taking many meetings with mostly men who qualify to meet some of our female VIP clients (interestingly, all the men we met this week are from Europe!)  We’ve even been doing house appointments to ensure complete discretion and privacy for some uber high profile VIP clients and prospects. In fact, last Saturday the Linx ladies arrived to a very high profile gentleman’s home in Silicon Valley to chat about matchmaking. We hear time and time again Linx Dating is the only matchmaker that well-educated, high caliber individuals would hire. Why? Due to our A+ reputation, scrupulous screening process, esteemed private network, and tireless dedication to our craft to name a few!

As the scope of our VIP client projects are vast and detailed, I’m hiring a highly skilled individual I’ve known for years to help with recruitment. She will leverage her existing networks and help source eligible individuals for us to add to our existing database and importantly, find people who could be that perfect “needle in a haystack” match for our VIPs. Following the Linx process, she will screen all candidates in person and cherry pick the best, weeding out the rest.

We protect our male and female clients all day long and serve as a giant filter for them. In the era of dating apps and dating “in the wild” on your own where you simply don’t know “who” you are dealing with, one can’t place a premium on the value we bring to our trusted clients.

We are also in the midst of planning a fabulous private Spring soiree in Silicon Valley. Linx events are always well attended and in high demand. Stay tuned for more on any upcoming events….

Next week is another very busy week with lots of matchmaking, appointments, and media projects. We are so grateful to our wonderful clients, match candidates in our database, and friends who provide such on-going support and love of Linx.

My dating advice for your upcoming dates this weekend is to always remember to be genuine! The worst thing you can do on a date is misrepresent yourself. Don’t pretend to be interested in things that truly bore you. Don’t bring up topics you don’t want to discuss. Don’t be silent about your own likes and dislikes because you don’t want to be judged.

Remember that, at heart, all Linx members are looking for the same thing – real and lasting human connections. So if you find yourself sitting across from a first date and neither of you knows what to say, start with the question that most single people would like to be asked more often; smile, take a deep breath, and open with “How was your day? ❤️

Have a great weekend ahead!

XX- Amy

 

Beauty and the Geeks…Linx Featured in Los Angeles Magazine

 

Happy .jpgHIGH-END MATCHMAKERS ARE DOING A BRISK BUSINESS PAIRING LOVELORN L.A. LADIES WITH SILICON VALLEY CEOS. Beauty and the Geeks Story for Los Angeles Magazine written by Sean Elder.

 

Did you hear the one about the actress who caught her boyfriend in bed with another woman?  “Tom!” she cried. “What are you doing?”  “Well, I got a speaking part in the new Spider-Man,” he replied, “and an American Express ad. …” Mona (not her real name) is a 45-year-old former movie actress who’d had it with fickle Hollywood types. “In my 20s I would only date guys in entertainment: actors, musicians, producers, directors. I needed the excitement. And then you have some experiences, and you get a little wiser.”

She dated businessmen and other professionals and fared no better until she started seeing a shrink who made her realize that she was dating the same kind of men and expecting different results. “The men that I was attracted to had narcissistic tendencies,” she says. “These guys were all successful and also very self-focused and pleased with themselves, perhaps a little too much.” That’s when she sought out a matchmaker.

For years any time one of her girlfriends became single, the others would say, “Head up to the San Francisco Bay Area.” “When I was younger, I probably would have never thought about dating a Silicon Valley guy,” says Mona. But according to Amy Andersen, the San Francisco-based matchmaker who worked with Mona to find the right man, the trend is bigger than her and her girlfriends. “About two and a half years ago, I started getting a ton of pings and inquiries from women living down in Los Angeles trying to find a good, like-minded man,” Andersen says.

As fate, or some algorithm, would have it, the tech world is rife with men with similar complaints. Some are modern masters of the universe. They work for companies and, in some cases, have created or developed products that changed the world and made them and many other people millions. But that does not mean that they can find the right woman Saturday night.

Take Jay, a pseudonym for a San Francisco investment mogul in his early 50s who, like most people in this story, didn’t want to be identified. Jay was married for 17 years before divorcing amicably. He missed the rise of online dating, though he made up for lost time a year after his divorce. “I was mainly immersing myself for the first time in dating sites and found it to be a very significant waste of time,” he says. “I developed empathy for my children in understanding the way these sites are set up to make you addicted to them and keep spinning faces to look for somebody.”

After spinning through a lot of faces, and going on a lot of dates, Jay decided to seek professional help. “I began interviewing a few matchmaking firms—actually I had my assistant do that—and then I got it down to a few, and I met them,” he says. After hear- ing what he was looking for in a woman, “they all told me you’re not likely to find that person in the San Francisco Bay Area.”

Andersen founded her company, Linx Dating, in part to find women for the men of Silicon Valley, who can be peculiar, to say the least. She grew up in nearby Marin County but got into a serious relationship with a “quintessential Silicon Valley geek,” to whom she is now married. “I witnessed that there was a huge surplus of eligible men and a dearth of women,” she says. The statistics back her up. According to a recent article in The Washington Post, there are 40 percent more men than women just in Palo Alto (home to SAP, Tesla, and Hewlett-Packard). Bear in 2018 women held only 20 jobs in tech. 

The line you’ll hear from women about dating in Silicon Valley is: “The odds are good, but the goods are odd.” Chances are that a genius coder or engineer spent his college years in his dorm room hunched over his laptop, while his less talented roommate was practicing pickup lines at parties. Those “odds” who went on to make their fortunes
didn’t do it by settling…..

Jay is wealthy enough to pay for a VIP, customized matchmaking experience. The woman he sought would be beautiful, yes, but older, preferably with kids—and into having more. “I’m looking for truly external and internal beauty,” he says. “And the external beauty factor in the Bay Area doesn’t seem to get divorced. I’ve now talked to five of these firms in depth for the last 20 months, and they all say the same thing, and no one has an explanation. There are just not many. There’s one: my ex. There are coyotes all over her.”

Jay says he has met some beautiful, intelligent, divorced women in the Bay Area. But he has complaints. “They have not taken care of themselves like these women that are in more vanity oriented cities,” he says. “Mainly skin care my friend. The sun does bad things. Yes, there are women in great shape in the Bay Area who do all this outdoor activity, but their skin shows their age.”

He says New York and L.A. have the best “supply side of women,” but the pool of eligible bachelorettes in their late 30s to 40s is greater in Los Angeles. “There are enormous numbers of women that either never got married, and now they’re 38 or had long-term relationships that didn’t work out, or they’re divorced,” he says. “And they’ve taken good care of themselves. There’s so many of them that want to get married to a monogamous partner, and the guys in L.A. are not capable of it.”

“The upside of Los Angeles is that arguably the most beautiful people in the country, if not the world, live there,” says Mona. “And then the downside of that is that it’s like a candy store for men.”

Through Andersen, Jay met a woman in Orange County who fit his bill. She owned a fitness business and had two kids in grade school—a plus for him. And if a fit, fun, smart woman of a certain age (presumably with great skin) was a novelty for Jay, you can imagine how he looked to his new girlfriend. “I feel like I’m a unicorn down there,” he says. “Like, you want to get married again? You actually are open to having children?” But after introducing her to his family and touring Europe with her on his yacht, Jay decided that his dream date still had issues she needed to sort out with her ex, and at press time they were on hiatus.

Unlike online dating, matchmakers are expensive. Andersen recruits eligible women to be part of her database and then tries to pair them with the right bachelor. Some women compensate the matchmaker if the pairing is successful, paying a bonus if they get married or engaged. But generally it’s the men who pay.

“People on the VIP level want us to exercise all options and not limit our search to an existing database,” says Andersen. “They want strategic searching, very akin to a professional headhunter looking for the perfect CEO for a tech company.”

Take Jack, a Silicon Valley pioneer in his 40s who worked for one of the biggest names in tech before moving on to help develop another brand-name technology. He also found dating apps a waste of time, though he partly blames himself for that. “I try to think of myself as a very kind person; I like to think of everyone as an amazing person that I could learn stuff from,” he says. “So I wouldn’t meet someone and go, ‘You’re not the right person for me’ and then cut it short. I’d end up spending three hours with them.”

And what wasn’t he finding in Silicon Valley? “A lot of the women were not as feminine as what I was used to in my upbringing,” he says, adding that his parents are “European.” “Even the women that are working in marketing jobs in tech companies, they’re just not as feminine as what I had acquired as a standard.” In a place where even the saleswomen don’t necessarily wear makeup, what’s a boy to do?

Enter Marie, who is in her late 30s and runs a successful entertainment company in L.A. “I never had any problems meeting men or [them] even wanting to pursue more serious relationships with me,” she says. Andersen introduced the couple over the phone more than a year ago; within a few months of meeting, Jack had bought a house in West L.A. not far from Marie. He proposed, and she accepted—but that relationship, too, has gone the way of all flesh. Jack decided he wanted to keep his options open, according to Andersen. “He can’t face the reality that relationships take work,” she says.

Mona was the itinerant partner in her relationship. She met her boyfriend through Andersen a few months ago, and they dated quite chastely. They went on eight dates before they kissed and waited three months before they slept together. He’s 60, a divorced dad, and a recognizable name in the tech world. “His experience was similar in that, when he went to Andersen, he said, ‘I’m looking for the person I’m going to spend the rest of my life with,’” she says.

The early signs were good. Despite her career as an actress in the world’s vainest city, Mona had resisted the pressure to get Botox. Miraculously her new Silicon Valley boyfriend told her he found the age lines around her eyes “beautiful.” Now they are moving in together, and he even bought them a second home on the beach in Malibu so she can stay close to her L.A. network. They’re talking about a wedding, and while they may not have settled on where to have the ceremony, they want the matchmaker to marry them.

 

 

The Law of Attraction: A Cornerstone of Linx Matchmaking

 

iStock-1126649057 copy.jpgWhen I look back at my modest beginnings—matching friends locally who were completely exhausted and disenchanted with dating—to growing a world class matchmaking business for clients around the world, I realize I couldn’t do it all without a little help from the universe.

 

The law of attraction is the single most powerful law in the universe. It states that you will attract that which you give. So, for example, if you stay positive, excited, and appreciative, you will send out this positive energy and will, in return, attract the same type of energy.

 

We are all responsible for our own destiny and, with the Law of Attraction, we can encourage our goals and desires to manifest.

 

Where did the Law of Attraction come from?

 

Despite seeming like a new age trend, the Law of Attraction speaks to a philosophy that’s appeared in countless religious texts. You can find it in the Book of Proverbs, chapter 23, verse 7, which states “As a man thinketh in his heart, so he is”. Buddha also captures the sentiment when he said, “All that we are is a result of what we have thought.”

 

The phrase ‘Law of Attraction’ was formally coined in the late 1800’s by Helena Blavatsky in her book Isis Unveiled. Although studied by various authors in the 1900’s, the 20th Century marked a resurgence in popularity, with best selling book, The Power of Positive Thinking and Blockbuster film, The Secret.

 

How do I get the Law of Attraction to work for me?

 

  1. Ask for what you want. Get specific.

Get intentional about how you communicate with the universe. To do this, start envisioning what your future will look like if you get what you want. Will you be doing the same things during the day? Who will you spend time with? What will you feel when you receive what you want?

 

The universe wants to know what you want. How it will come to be, however, may not be the path or timeline you expected.

 

Examples:

  • “I want to feel peace in my relationship–unconditionally loved by my partner.”
  • “I want to feel valued for my work contributions and proud of my work.”
  • “I want to build a home that allows me to host loved ones and feel self-expressed.”

 

  1. Believe that you’ll get what you ask for, and then start moving towards the goal.

Maintaining positive energy about your goal and the certainty that you will accomplish it will propel you into action. Understand that forces beyond you are now working on your behalf. If it is love that you want, becoming more loving and generous will help you attract people who operate on this wave-length.

 

If “I want to feel peace in my relationship–unconditionally loved by my partner” is your intention, propel yourself into action by:

 

  • Remembering that you can choose the type of relationship you want.
  • Welcoming opportunities to meet people who may turn out to be just one you had in mind.
  • Allowing yourself to be present for your partner’s vulnerable side.
  • Showing your own vulnerabilities and appreciating your partner’s support.

 

 

  1. Become the “vibrational match” for what you ask. 

Maintaining positive energy is not always easy—especially after a string of bad dates. It takes practice and, many times, a new perspective. Having trouble focusing on the good, the happiness, or the wins in your life? Focus on gratitude. Several dates fell apart? The person you liked didn’t feel the same? Thank the universe for taking these people who aren’t the right fit out of your life quickly.

 

Examples:

  • After a bad date, try thinking: “This experience helped me realize that I need a partner who’s less arrogant. Meeting the ones who aren’t for me will make it that much easier to see the ones who are special.”
  • After a break up: “Though painful, I’m grateful that I won’t have to convince someone to be with me. I now have time to meet someone who sees a future together.”

 

Who else believes in the Law of Attraction?

 

Lady Gaga: “It happened around 5 years ago but it’s sort of like a mantra. You repeat it to yourself every day. “Music is my life. Music is my life. The fame is inside of me. I’m going to make a number one record and the number one hit.” And it’s not yet, it’s a lie. You’re saying a lie over and over and over again but then one day, the lie is true.”

 

Eckhart Tolle: “Whatever you think the world is withholding from you, you are withholding from the world. Whatever you think people are withholding from you – praise, appreciation, assistance, loving care, and so on – give it to them.”

 

Will Smith: “I believe that I can create whatever I want to create. If I can put my head on it right, study it, learn the patterns, and — it’s hard to put into words, it’s real metaphysical, esoteric nonsense, but I feel very strongly that we are who we choose to be.”

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My Story

 

Having the opportunity to share my passion has paid dividends. Following my unique path and letting the universe help me reach people on their path has been such a rewarding experience.  I’ve met so many beautiful people on their search for love. Together, we’ve figured out exactly what kind of partner would be the best fit while, I, in the background, work on making quality introductions until both my client and the match are head over heels.

 

With over a decade of experience, I understand the romantic landscape—not just in the Bay Area, but worldwide. I’ve worked with clients from abroad and right here at home in Silicon Valley. I’ve had the privilege of attending weddings, anniversaries, and even baby showers for clients who’ve benefitted from Linx matchmaking.

 

I’ve manifested my best life, and, now, it’s time for me to help others manifest theirs.

 

The Offer

 

If you or someone you know has had “enough” with the dating scene, I want to hear from you! I am gifting my services to one person with a unique story who’s ready to meet the best the Bay has to offer.

There’s no gimmick. There’s no sales pitch. I’m offering a complete Linx matchmaking package that’s valued at over $15,000 for free.

Are you ready? Email me amy@linxdating.com and tell me about yourself or a friend you’d like to nominate!

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Happy Holidays and to a Magical 2020 Ahead! 

XO,

Amy Andersen

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

5 Questions to ask your prospective matchmaker when choosing which firm to work with:

1. How did you get into matchmaking – why do you do what you do?
2. How, and from where, do you source potential matches as “leads” and what is your subsequent vetting process?  In other words, what is the “secret sauce?”
3. Are my ideal match criteria realistic and do you honestly feel that you have high quality candidates for me in your existing database or would you need to source outside the current database?
4. At what point does a “match” become “official?” May I veto potential matches or do you unilaterally make that call?
5. Tell me about a recent success story of yours and why you matched that particular couple.

Going the distance: How feasible is long-distance love?

 

iStock-1027701870 copy.jpgMaybe you met someone abroad. Maybe someone from abroad met you. Either way, you’re wondering if those romantic feelings can lead anywhere at all because of the distance. Of course distance can pose some unique challenges compared to dating a local single, but you might be surprised to learn those extra miles could be the fastest track into your next serious relationship.

Does distance make the heart grow fonder? The short answer: Yes.

 Two scientists, Crystal Jiang, City University of Hong Kong and Jeffrey Hancock, Cornell University, compared intimacy levels among couples in LDRs and local relationships. Surprisingly, the distance couples reported much higher levels of intimacy.

Researchers attributed the additional closeness to two unique characteristics. Firstly, the people in the LDR disclose more about themselves—more details, more vulnerability—that promote a higher rating of closeness versus the everyday chit chat from couples who live together. Secondly, distance couples tend to idealize their partners. Without opportunities to see their partner’s off days, people in LDR’s can hold on to that idealized version of their love interest longer.

In theory, my heart might grow fonder, but in reality won’t there be communication issues?

Ironically, couples communicating across distance enjoyed a greater sense of closeness than local couples. In one study published in the Journal of Communication, researchers found that although couples in LDRs weren’t always in constant communication, the overall quality of the communication was rated highly. After analyzing the diaries, texts, calls, and video chats, researchers learned that couples in long distance relationships shared more personal details.

Additionally, The Journal of Communication reports that the communication style between distance couples was rated less “problematic” than couples living closer—probably attributed to the fact that distance forces time between an emotional response and a reaction.

So, how much does the distance really matter?

Apparently, not that much. One study published in the Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy reported that couples living apart were just as happy as couples living in the same city. Even before the realities of distance set in, distance couples “perceived a lower likelihood of breaking up with their partner” when researchers wanted to measure commitment compared to locally-based relationships.

Ultimately, when these same participants were polled four months later about their relationship status, the break up rates between distance and local couples were the same.

Perhaps, we’re spending too much time wondering how the distance will make things harder rather than how it can help us get more intentional about connecting. If the chances of making love last are the same, why not see where those loving feelings take you?

 

7 Practical Ways to Make Your Long Distance Relationship Work

 

iStock-925386886 copy 2.jpgMaybe you’ve met someone on vacation or you’ve decided to look for love in more than one (local) place—and found it. Either way, you want to see where the relationship is going, and you don’t want distance to get in the way. To make the best of your long distance relationship, we suggest these 7 practical ways to help make that (temporary) distance a mechanism to bring you closer.

 

  1. You spearhead constant communication.

Naturally, you and your long distance partner will share bigger life events, but it’s talking about the small stuff—the daily minutia—that will make your relationship feel “normal”. Ask the small talk questions and try to track the recurring characters. The goal is to get enough information so that you can hear updates without having to ask the who, what, or why each time.

 

  1. You make being accessible a top priority.

Work schedules and sleep schedules across different time zones can make connecting more difficult, but not impossible. A little bit of planning can bridge the gap.

  • Send What’s App messages before bed so that your partner can wake up with you.
  • Spend one lunch break, breakfast, or dinner together via skype. Yes, that’s right. Pull out the computer with your glass of red.
  • Download WhatsApp or Facebook messenger to avoid unnecessary costs associated with international messaging fees.

 

What it looks like: One client went for a 30 day meditation retreat in northern India. Although she prepped her partner well before her month-long departure, she sensed his skepticism and slight resentment over her plans. To bridge the gap and stay true to her break from technology, she wrote him a letter or post card almost every day detailing her thoughts and realizations. His inability to communicate back left much to be discussed upon her return. Instead of creating distance, the month apart ultimately brought them closer together.

 

  1. Try different types of communication.

Spice up your communication style with something new. Take a break from the texting or phone and opt for a video call. After so many texts, you can miss important nuances and forget the little personality quirks that make your partner unique. The point is to make distance seem more like a slight inconvenience than a real barrier. The phone calls will give you insight to tone and mood; the video chats will help you decipher the real emotion. Even snail mail might help you see a more serious, intentional emotional side.

 

  1. Be romantic.

You won’t be around to make her coffee or buy her flowers, so find new ways to make her feel loved. Coordinate a flower delivery—out of the blue—to show that yes, you value romance and will make that happen regularly once you’re together. Use this temporary time apart to provide a preview of coming attractions.

 

What it looks like: One client started dating a man shortly before he fielded a work assignment in Germany. Whereas she wasn’t interested in dating across continents, he had different plans. Shortly before Valentine’s Day, the man got in touch with the client’s closest friend to figure out the perfect romantic gesture. Together, they decided the client needed a anti-stress holiday. He reserved a hotel room and a spa day for both women and arranged for a bottle of champagne and cheese plate to be delivered shortly after they arrived. The thoughtfulness and surprise factor was all the client needed to wait out his return.

 

  1. Always have a meeting in the works.

To survive the hurdles of distance, it’s easier to have a goal—like a meeting that’s right around the corner. Have the next meeting in the works before you end up apart. Whether it’s a short trip or a long holiday, all that matters is that you two know you have definitive plans to be together.

 

  1. Get a credit card with travel perks.

It’s as obvious as it sounds, and yet lots of couples miss out on the perks. Find a card that pays you back in miles or upgrades or lounge visits. If you’re anticipating time apart, get a card that’s going to make it even easier to get together.

 

  1. And, finally, remember just how little time you’ll be apart in the grand scheme of things. Something special is worth the wait. If you’re meant to be together forever, one week, one month, or one year, will hardly matter. Linx has brought so many couples together who are separated by cities, states, and countries. Couples have navigated these waters by following the aforementioned tips and ultimately overcoming distance, to say “I Do!”  💍 ❤️

Former American Diplomat seeks his traditional match 25-35 years old

 

iStock-697044734 copy.jpgWe are thrilled to announce a new search for our international bachelor. Our client is a true renaissance man. He’s a 38-year-old 6ft former Ivy League football player with a Yugoslavian mother and African American father.  He is a mix between Jason Bourne and Marty Khan and has served as a Counterintelligence Officer in the US military, been an American Diplomat, and now works as an international management consultant for a top 5 firm in the Mid East.

He combines a Hollywood smile and a movie star’s charisma with an endless supply of energy and an engineer’s intellectual curiosity.  The man is polished, erudite, and displays the manners and global savvy of the experienced diplomat he is.  Although high strung, he is gregarious, engaging, and the kind of guy that makes toddlers smile and giggle when he greets them (he once worked as a kindergarten teacher in his early 20s).

He’s handsome with a mischievous aurora and is a true globetrotter that has been to over 117 countries.  In addition to being an avid tennis enthusiastic he provides tutoring and mentorship to inner-city kids wanting to attend elite schools.
Currently based in a booming Middle East hub with an amazing expatriate package that includes ½ a floor at a five-star hotel, household staff, driver, and private school for the kiddies when you have them. After serving his country in several global hotspots he is now ready to settle down and be the family man that he always wanted to be.  He is a traditionalist and is comfortable being the breadwinner for the family but is also open to a careerist partner.

His ideal match is between the ages of 25-35, open on her heritage, although leans towards exotic, in shape, and with feminine curves. She is engaging, interesting, humble, loyal, an optimistic by nature, and prefers a traditional man. As our client is current based in the Middle East, this candidate needs to be open to travel and possible relocation.

If you or anyone you know might make a great fit for this gentleman, please email Amy directly at: amy@linxdating.com Thank you!