invite-only dating network

As cliche as it might sound….our newest VIP is truly the whole package and then some!

Our client is 52-years old, Caucasian, and clean cut with a full head of dark hair. He stands 6’2” and has a solid athletic build, largely owed to his long-standing track record of participating in competitive sports (during which he has won multiple accolades!). Born in San Francisco, this gentleman was raised in a modest, North Bay country town where he spent time on the ranch, learned the value of perseverance, and developed his confidence and entrepreneurial attitude. Carrying these virtues throughout his life, he now resides in an elegant, gated golf course community in the San Francisco Bay Area.

By day, he is an accomplished plastic surgeon and has founded one of the finest medical centers in the country – here, in his own hospital, he cares for patients and sees clients from all over the world. He is also an angel investor and strategic advisor, and companies in his field frequently seek his expertise and help in business development and commercialization of new medical devices. He also serves as a C-level executive for a public company in the aesthetic industry, where he is able to creatively further his passions – from dreaming up new technologies to developing them, testing for FDA approval, and even launching, our client is a man who is able to wear many hats. In fact, he also serves as the Chair of the Board for an organization that is working to provide a local athletic program for underprivileged youth, which he finds very personally fulfilling.  

Despite a packed professional schedule, our client has nights, weekends, and holidays off (except for the occasional business dinner or social/professional event). Making sure to protect his personal time, he starts the weekend at noon on Fridays by hopping in his plane and jetting off for a weekend adventure! Frequent destinations include his vacation homes in Lake Tahoe and the Coachella Valley, but air trips anywhere are often spontaneous: Sedona, Bend, Vegas, Seattle, Scottsdale, SoCal, the world is your oyster! He is also a fantastic cook and loves to host holiday gatherings with family and friends. Did we mention that he also makes Napa wine? 

For him, family is a priority – both yours and his. Though he unfortunately lost his father who was an influential figure in his life, he is still very close with his mom. Nowadays, he is an empty nester with two kids in college (20 and 18 years old), though he spent many years coaching his kids’ sports teams and loved to be the “cool dad” who hosted massive slumber parties (often with more than 25 kids at a time!).  

Our client is stable, dependable, and driven. He has faced significant adversity in his life and has always taken it as an opportunity to better himself – he is a rock and has a rather grounding presence. He is affectionate, easygoing, and loves to tease and laugh. He is also highly intellectual, practical, well-read, and quite the expert on a variety of topics, with outstanding focus, determination, and off-the-chart efficiency. He has traditional values, a strong central core, and considers himself deeply spiritual, though he is not religious. In this vein, he realizes that we are one and that the future is bright, despite the challenging circumstances of our current reality.  

His ideal match is 28-48 years old, well-educated, accomplished, and has demonstrated excellence in some capacity. Ideally, she is Caucasian, European, or Latina, and like him, she doesn’t sweat the small stuff and would rather share a good laugh than act combative. She is warm, affectionate, and fun! She prefers to be present and fully enjoy amazing activities together, rather than being wrapped up in documenting it for other people. She is elegant, poised, and always classy, naturally inspiring envy in others at professional and more sophisticated events. She is dignified and respectable with few regrets. She is fit, slender, and stunning with classic, natural beauty: polished but not overdone, all-American, drop-dead gorgeous girl-next- door, perhaps a bit exotic or unique.

Most of all, she is secure and confident in herself. She also has traditional values and rejects entitlement in life, understanding that the more you generously give, the more you get. She is adaptable and not pretentious; like our client, she enjoys sophistication as much as down-to-earth activities like sporting events, family get-togethers, outdoor BBQs, and just hanging out by the pool. She is grounded, stable, leads a clean life, and is not easily distracted by negative external influences. She recognizes that life has a way of throwing out challenges when you least expect it, but she values that he will always have her back, as she does his. In a partner, she is looking for a strong, traditional, and caring alpha, rather than a more modern, disorganized, man-child pajama boy.

If you or anyone you know might make the perfect match for this VIP, please submit your information here. There are NO fees for qualified candidates to meet our client.

Guess what? She’s a former rocket scientist turned attorney who’s seeking her self-assured co-pilot to navigate life with…

FOR SINGLE MEN AGES 40-56

Our confident and classy bachelorette is a late 40s native Californian of Chinese descent.  Standing at 5’6” (if you manage to catch her without her high heels on), she is slender with wavy black hair, a playful attitude, and a compassionate heart.

Professionally, she is a lawyer but before you instantly get put off by that, let’s clarify that she’s not your typical attorney.  She’s a former engineer that gave up designing planes for patents, so she considers herself a mix of geeky, intellectual, and fun.  Having a job that allows her to work from anywhere in the world, she has been fortunate enough to have traveled to over 40 countries and partake in some amazing adventures such as making the perfect pizza in Rome; exploring countless temples in Asia; spelunking in Australia and New Zealand; hot air ballooning over Cappadocia; cruising the Nile; dog sledding in the Arctic; and riding a camel into the Moroccan sunset.  An explorer at heart, there are still many journeys that she would love to fill her passport with – perhaps with you.     

Although our bachelorette is ambitious and driven in her goals and appreciate those qualities in a partner, she believes that happiness requires balance.  When she is not working or traveling, you will find her unwinding on a different hiking trail every week, catching up with friends, or unleashing her creative side in the kitchen.  Her ideal match should love or at least pretend to like carbs (and her cooking 😉).

While she has lived an amazing life, she believes it would be even better to share the fun and adventures with someone special.  Her best suited match is between the ages of 40-56 and Caucasian in heritage.  Friends would describe him as balanced and self-assured with a great sense of humor and strong core values.  He can easily engage in a serious discussion or trade witty banter but can also appreciate a comfortable silence.  Ideally, he’s established in his career, politically right leaning, and is looking for a fellow traveler with whom to explore life and the world.   

Although our client is based in Silicon Valley, she can picture herself basking in the idyllic lifestyle of the South – you know, bucolic green lawns, scrumptious comfort food, Southern hospitality, and raising a family with you.  Her ideal match has a bit of wanderlust to adventurous spirit and likes the idea of splitting time elsewhere or escaping the Bay Area entirely. 

If you or anyone you know might make a fantastic match for our bachelorette, please email Amy directly at: amy@linxdating.com

There are ZERO fees for qualifying candidates. Thank you!

Virtual Dating Tips and Guidance during COVID-19

As California is approaching nearly 2 months of shelter-in-place, Linx has transitioned to the reality of quarantine with mostly reasonable ease and we have been grateful at the number of people not holding back on signing up for memberships during COVID-19. 

While clients are very much wanting to meet each other in person, they know that this is not the time for that and have accepted the new normal of virtual dates – and some very creative ones at that. 

Approximately 75% of our premium clients are wanting to keep their searches going and try to continue to meet people during quarantine, while the remaining 25% are waiting for this to pass and “freezing” their memberships in the meantime.  Many are very open to long-distance dating, especially during this stage, and finding it such an easy way to explore chemistry without the hassle and expense of having to hop on a plane for an in-person date.   

Virtual dating is proving to be a very quick way to determine if there are some sparks, all while in the convenience of your own home.  


We are seeing a small handful of our clients venture outside to gardens and parks for their first and second dates. Our couples are being safe by placing a large blanket down and sitting at least 6-feet from one another and bringing their own drink and food to enjoy. While this is not the same of getting to dine at a fabulous restaurant with crisp table linens and a well-trained staff, this is our new normal – at last for the time being. Furthermore, there is something old-fashioned and quite romantic about setting up a picnic and slowing down from our days to enjoy fresh air and conversation at a distance.


I’m getting a lot of clients and members of Linx asking advice on how to be successful at their virtual dating. My general advice for virtual dates is to treat them just like any regular date. Always put your best foot forward and remember that just because you are on Zoom or FaceTime, the age old expression “first impressions are lasting ones” does play a very important role during quarantine.  

Some more specific advice when planning your virtual dates… Wear a pop of color (forget wearing white) and for women, do some tasteful makeup.  Guys – clean yourself up and put on a dress shirt, or frankly anything but a sloppy t-shirt and shorts.  Most of us feel our best when we are freshly showered and dressed for the occasion. Imagine you are going to an upscale lounge or restaurant for a meal….you wouldn’t wear a t-shirt and flip flops so the same principles apply when dating during quarantine – especially in the early stages as you’re getting to know one another. 

Once you are dressed and looking fresh and vibrant, set the stage for potential romance and create the right ambiance. I have one client who keeps doing his virtual dates at his office. This is a buzz kill for his dates. Why? He is not separating work from pleasure and also not taking the virtual dates seriously. You need to separate your work and work environment from your dating life. So find a location in your home that is appropriate for this – and that definitely doesn’t mean your bedroom either. Think living room, dining room, or family room/den. 

Light a candle, order a “ring light” on Amazon for optimal warm, ambient lighting or if you don’t have the budget for that, read what Tom Ford suggests for looking good on Zoom. Timing is everything. Do the Zoom date when the house is quiet (if you have kids, they are snoozing or in another room doing their homework ;-)) so you’re not distracted. If you drink, pour a cocktail or glass of wine, and if you don’t drink, pour a bubbly water with some citrus fruit or fresh mint leaves to feel festive and start your virtual date! Smile and keep the energy of the virtual date upbeat, happy, and chill. 

What if the first virtual date goes well and you’re wanting to get a little more creative for the next series of virtual dates? For out-of-the-box date ideas, I am sharing the following ideas with my clients including:

1) Be a chef. Open your kitchen, show him/her a favorite recipe you like to make and vice versa. Do this using your favorite tech platform.

2. Be romantic. Flex your brain muscles and read him/her poetry or a chapter from a book you’re reading, or share your screen with some of your favorite YouTube tv or movie clips or music (make sure to select “share computer audio” when you share your screen.) Use it as a launchpad for further conversation. You’re showing him/her a new dimension of what makes you incredibly unique.

3. Be an artist. Even if you’re not going to be the next da Vinci, become your own individual artist! Each buy an inexpensive paint set online, schedule the date for when your respective sets arrive at your homes, set up your Zoom and have a painting date. Use it as an opportunity to giggle at one another’s art work, once canvases are complete.

It is also interesting to me that many clients are immediately removing the superficial layer of first dates and delving very deep in the virtual dates by asking one another intense questions. One recommendation is accessing the The New York Times “36 Questions on the Way to Love” interactive quiz and quickly sizing up if there are long-term foundational values in alignment or not. It’s proving to be a powerful way to determine if there is enough in common to keep virtually dating or rather to move on.  This is yet another approach to incorporate.

With the curiosity and excitement of virtual dating, you might be wondering the risks and downsides. I think one of the major drawbacks is that some people just feel plain awkward dating virtually. It feels weird for them and simply not natural. Also, many people want to see what someone looks like in the flesh, smell their perfume, see the glistening of the gloss of their lips as the sun hits them a certain way, hug them, maybe kiss at the end of the date to test that important chemistry. Clearly you can’t do this with virtual dating, so this is a significant downside.

That said, the upshot I keep telling my clients is to keep exploring the virtual connections and when restrictions are lifted, to be able to imagine how exciting it will be to finally see their love interest in person. I think the potential of how magnetic the chemistry could be at that moment could be life-changing. 

COVID-19 has placed each and every one of us in a vulnerable place and sharing that vulnerability with someone else could not only forever bond that couple but catapult them into a love that can be tested through time.  

With that said, though, it is important not to force the transition to meeting in person – we are all (including our government) trying to figure the right time and pace to begin re-introducing social contact, and it will probably come down to each person’s comfort and tolerance for different types of risk.   Please be tolerant as we each are dealing with this in our own way and in the meantime keep staying healthy and safe. 

If you are on Instagram, I do daily simple inspirational posts to which many folks have responded very positively. If you would like to follow me, please do so at “Ms.LinxDating.” Thank you so much!

Love in the time of coronavirus: Making the most of quarantine

As cities around the country and the world go into coronavirus lockdown, your search for love doesn’t have to shelter in place. In fact, being in quarantine is a great opportunity to look inward to ask yourself what qualities you really want in a partner and is a chance to prepare yourself for a relationship once the quarantine ends.

Cultivating solitude and embracing it to find love

For naturally social creatures, getting locked into our homes with no end date can be tough to navigate, even for those of us with high levels of immunity to loneliness. 


To make peace with solitude, scientists recommend reframing the loneliness. 


Reed Larson, professor of human development and family studies at the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign found that solitude is like “a medicine which tastes bad, but leaves one more healthy in the long run,” that creates more positive emotions and less self-reported depression down the line. Susan Cain, author of the book Quiet, says “solitude is a crucial and underrated ingredient of creativity.”  This time of social distance is the perfect opportunity to get close with solitude.


So, how is solitude relevant to finding a partner?


Researchers Christopher Long and James Averill write that time alone allows us to order our priorities according to what we need, rather than the needs of others. Solitude is a powerful experience that allows us to prioritize what we want in our relationships. 

Start by asking yourself the following:

  • Am I listening closely to what I want?
  • How much do I weigh what my friends or family want for me? 
  • What story does my dating life tell?

If answering these questions feels confusing, you’re not alone; isolation can make it difficult to experience clarity, but hang in there and don’t let this opportunity slip away.

Sherry Turkle, researcher and the founder of the MIT Initiative on Technology and Self talks about our apprehension towards embracing solitude in her Ted talk: “The moment that people are alone, even for a few seconds, they become anxious, they panic, they fidget, they reach for a device. Just think of people at a checkout line or at a red light.”


Turkle goes on to urge people to create sacred spaces to embrace solitude, where you don’t get distracted or reach for your phone—such as an hour in the morning or lunchtime in between your remote conference calls.  It can be over a quiet cup of tea, a soak in a hot epsom salt bath, or whatever else might work for you.

That said, even once you’ve had a chance for solitude, your mind might still not be the easiest place to dwell. Past relationships and other noise can make it impossible to ask ourselves the questions we need to answer before continuing the search for a loving partner. 


Consulting with a matchmaker can help bring focus into the equation. Not only can we be a sounding board to get clarity on what those relationship priorities are, we’ll be able to jumpstart your love life once social restrictions are lifted. 

Building connection amidst quarantine

If you were already dating before the quarantine, you’ll need to get creative to build and sustain the connection. 

  • Host a remote movie date. Netflix just released their Netflix Party Chrome extension that lets you watch “Netflix remotely with friends, e.g. for movie nights with that long-distance special someone. It synchronizes video playback and adds group chat.” Should pair well with a quarantine.
  • Take a (virtual) museum stroll. Google Arts & Culture has partnered with some of the world’s most popular museums to give patrons a chance to see art and exhibits through their computer screens. The virtual tour might not be the most ideal, but you’ll get some brownie points for creativity.
  • Spend a night at the opera. The Met is live streaming their operas each day. Of course you’d be more inclined to watch from the first row balcony, but desperate times call for alternative seating.
  • Try a new (love) language. With quality time and physical touch on hold, give acts of service and words of affirmation a try. Support your favorite local restaurant and get a meal delivered. Check in frequently with texts and calls—don’t skimp on showing appreciation.

And if you’re combining social distance with long distance, then be sure to check out my practical tips on making long distance work.

As always, I am here to support you! Consider scheduling a virtual matchmaking session to get the process started. Once quarantine is over, you’ll be ready to mingle with some of the most eligible singles from around the world!

Announcing New Search: Our Client is Brains + Beauty Personified….

General Background:

-Our client is 32 years old 

-Canadian citizen/ Grew up in Canada and spent considerable time in Asia. 

-Bi-continental lifestyle. Bilingual English + Chinese

-Unique upbringing, in-depth understanding of both cultures 

-Currently residing in Canada

-Will be mostly based between Bay Area + Los Angeles + NYC post-Covid travel restrictions 

-Graduated from top tier university 

-Never married and does not have children 


Physical appearance: 

-Our client is a knock-out physically

-5’5” -Slender hourglass figure and very feminine

-Long brunette hair with accents of highlights 

-Stylish and classy

 -Keeps in shape with daily fitness 


Hobbies and Lifestyle:

-Scuba diving (open water diver) 

-International travel

-Classical music, fine arts, Broadway shows

-Animal and nature lover

-Loves to cook Chinese food and dining in general 

-Looks forward to designing and decorating a home with her husband one day


Professionally: 

-Our client is an entrepreneur running her own dynamic business 

-She enjoys surrounding herself by individuals that can talk about global affairs, world economics, history and politics  


Personality: 

– Although our client runs her own business, she’s looking for a masculine alpha man to balance her strong feminine energy

– She is extremely nurturing and in a relationship wants to adhere to more traditional gender roles celebrating the male/female dichotomy 

– Our client is best described as super genuine, loving, with a warm heart, introspective, smart, and possessing strong family values 

-She’s FUN, passionate and definitely the glass is half full mentality 

-Not into drama 


Who is her match: 

-In a nutshell, this man is in his 30’s-40’s

-He is worldly and has a business brain

-He’s globally minded, ambitious, generous, kind, and has a provider mentality

-He’s strong and reliable, lives his life with integrity and a moral compass, confident in his actions, and has seen the world 

-He has international experience, or well traveled and is a global minded entrepreneur)

-He is ready for the next stage in his life including children. Operates on little to no drama and has the clarity and vision for going after what he wants in life

-He’s well respected by colleagues and friends would describe him as a loyal and a dear friend


If you or anyone you know might make an exceptional fit for our female client, please email Amy at: amy@linxdating.com

What Linx members are saying….

Grateful for our fabulous Linx clients! Here are two recent testimonials that came in from a 30 and 40-something in the Bay Area and LA.

“Amy does a stellar job finding the best available match for each of her clients within her network.

On an online platform I probably would have passed on the candidates I ended up liking the most, had she not brought them to my attention. This is why I recommend my high quality single friends and colleagues to join Linx.

The more options she can choose from, the better chance she has to pick the ideal partner for you. This is good for everyone! 🙂  Go Amy!!!” 

“Amy Andersen is in a league of her own! My experience with her has been so enjoyable and has reminded me of how much fun that dating can be. She has a keen attention to detail, succinct prescreening questions, and a knack for working with high quality people that are commitment minded.

What makes her stand out above all is her follow up and genuine interest in a positive outcome… I have yet to meet another matchmaker on her level that has been such a dating expert – she’s actually like a dating coach.

All relationships would go much more smoothly if Amy was there as a dating coach…”

Finding Love After IPO

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You’ve poured your life into building your business. Long hours, lack of sleep, endless meetings have been your priority and, now, your time and dedication has paid off—your company is going public.

 

And, just like that, your social presence grows overnight. You’re inundated with speaking requests. You’re also inundated with a lot of romantic interest.

 

I’ve met several executives eager to re-prioritize their personal goals in the wake of an IPO. I’ve seen them struggle to find the right person—or even just a legitimate date—after coming into wealth and extra publicity. Ironically, for these clients, I’ve seen the dating space morph into a minefield of sorts.

 

How do you know if your next date is dating you for the right reasons?

 

How can you be sure that your private dating life stays private?

 

How will you know where to find the most eligible singles?

 

Just as you would hire a personal trainer to get fit or an accountant to organize your finances, I’ve been hired countless times to help extremely discerning clientele find their next partner.

 

To help my clients understand what they want in their next relationship and how to get it, I compare the process for finding the right partner to building a business.

 

  1. What problem are you trying to solve?

Perhaps you’re trying to remedy loneliness or are interested in building partnership. Maybe you’d like to “feel alive” with no strings attached, or you’re finally thinking it’s time to start a family. Most successful products and businesses are created to solve a specific problem—what’s yours?

 

Not sure where to start?

 

Envision your future. In five years, what kind of life do you envision? Where are you living? What are you doing? What would your mother say about you? How would your best friend describe you? Write it down.

 

  1. Set realistic expectations about the process.

What steps will you take in the short term to help meet your goals? Clients tend to be clear on their goals, but they can get a little lost on the game plan.

 

Some questions to ask yourself:

 

How much time do you plan to carve out per week to devote to your dating life?

 

How will you meet new people?

 

How will you date? Casual introductions over wine? Grand romantic gestures?

 

  1. Keep Iterating.

The qualities you look for may change during the dating process. Be open to the process and be prepared to adjust your ideas accordingly. Whereas it’s perfectly natural to have preferences (don’t we all?), you might find that your more urgent needs are satisfied by someone without the specific packaging.

 

Tip: Compromise on the packaging, never the standards.

 

  1. Hire your Weaknesses.

The demands of growing an empire may have distracted you from fine tuning your dating skills. Constant travel and other obligations may have limited your interactions to people in your professional network. Instead of trying to solve every problem at once, heed the words of billionaire Spanx founder Sara Blakely and “hire your weaknesses.”

 

Find the person you can trust; the person who has demonstrated enough experience in the realm of long-term relationships to help you make the best decision of your life. In the wake of money, media attention, and limited time, an extra pair of eyes, ears, and vetting could pay a lifetime of dividends.

 

With over a decades’ worth of experience serving high-profile clientele, I’m privy to the unique demands and sensitivities involved in the search for partnership. If you’re ready to hand off the reins to Silicon Valley’s leading matchmaker, get in touch.

 

Love and best wishes ❤️,

Amy

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Linx on Instagram! ms.linxdating

Dear Faithful Readers,

Yes, I am very behind the times setting up a professional account for Instagram but at long last, it’s up!

Please follow me on Instagram at  ms.linxdating  

If you enjoy all things related to Linx, dating, relationships, events, VIP client travel, glamour, and happenings in Silicon Valley and beyond please follow!

XO,

Amy

Matchmaking In a League of Our Own

When you hire Linx Dating to find the ❤️ of your life, you work directly with me, Amy Andersen. As my client, you receive my individual attention and I am involved in absolutely every aspect of the matchmaking process. What are some aspects that make Linx far superior and different compared to run-of-the-mill matchmaking firms and so called “dating services?” Here are some differentiating points that separate Linx and put Linx in a league of its own.

-Linx is discreet, does not cater to the masses, represents a very high caliber group of clientele who seek out its niche, highly reputable approach to matchmaking, and has built a stellar reputation over 15 years.

-There are many other services that claim to be exclusive and to be working with elite clients, but the reality is they are broadcasting their services in airline magazines.   Linx is the only upscale matchmaking firm not to advertise its services – we do not need to, as our client base is built via word-of-mouth referrals from happy clients and ours/their extended social and professional networks.

-Being selective in whom we admit for membership and, in return, doing an excellent job for our clients,  Linx holds itself to a higher level of ethnical business standards. Many local Bay Area and “global” businesses have gone out of business or deal with very unfortunate ramifications from bad business practices. It has never been our goal as a business to take on more clients than we can handle or to be so eager as to close business without really making sure that it is mutually synergistic. *That* is precisely where other matchmakers run into trouble. Most agencies are so focused on “closing the deal” and can come across as extremely pushy and frankly don’t really care about the actual prospect or their unique story.

-We personally vet every match in painstaking detail so that each introduction is carefully curated and worth a serious investment of your time in getting to know them. This is the antithesis of online or offline “volume dating” where you might hope to get lucky with the law of large numbers.

-Linx is extremely proud to represent many FEMALES as clients. It sounds “backwards” but the truth is that most firms don’t represent educated and dynamic women as actual clients. Linx represents many extremely bright, sophisticated, and elegant women as our clients who also have stellar academic backgrounds, for example. Should you research other firms, most firms would simply place you in their passive database with thousands of other women, rather than take you on as a fulltime client.

-We provide highly personalized service in all aspects of the experience. Linx accepts only a select number of members annually and one of the appeals is that they work with me, the founder and CEO, directly throughout the search. In addition to Linx matchmaking, we have partnerships with exclusive lifestyle and luxury international concierge agents, as well as, stylists, fitness trainers, dermatologists, plastic surgeons, domestic and estate help, and much more.

-Linx is highly responsive at all times, 24-7.  Why? Because I care. I am beyond passionate about my craft and feel extremely grateful to work with the best of the best clientele.

 

 

5 Easy Ways to Attract a Quality Woman

 

iStock-543806276 copy.jpgFinding someone single, attractive, and interesting is only half the battle. Finding someone capable of sharing a future can be a much more difficult task. If you find yourself dating—but never finding sustainability—with the same type of women, you need to think about re-evaluating your dating style.

Homework

Make a list of all the qualities you want in a partner. Now ask yourself: Do I possess these qualities? If the answer isn’t a definite yes, then it might be time to re-evaluate your expectations.

The best way to attract a quality woman is simple: Become that which you’d like to attract. Here are 5 ways to get her attention.

 

  1. Do interesting things.

Sounds simple, right? Unfortunately, so many of us fall into routines—and the routine can get old. No need to make grand changes, you can spice up your schedule with relatively small tweaks. Opt for a cooking class, art show, or concert. Try a new lunch place. Meet people different from yourself. Say “yes” to new experiences, even if it’s ‘not your thing’.

The most interesting people have lived through vast experiences—not all of which were pleasant. Successes and failures all contribute to a well-rounded character, so it’s in your best interest to take some risks. You will surprise yourself, and she will appreciate you for it.

 

Homework

If you’ve invited to a networking event, dinner party, or frankly any social gathering, NEVER refuse an invitation. You never know who you are going to meet. Furthermore, try two new activities in the next 60 days. Diversify your routine and see what happens.

 

  1. Enjoy the company of women, without an agenda.  

When finding a partner is top of mind, your conversation will slant in that direction instead of evolving organically. Give each other a chance to develop some attraction. The anxiety that can stem from a potential rejection will influence your interaction. Let the date be a secondary objective and just talk.

The thrill of the chase can also get in the way of determining if there’s anything beyond physical attraction. Instead of pursuing the most physically enticing woman, try to find the woman who makes you feel the most comfortable. Establishing some semblance of emotional connectivity will help you establish a firm foundation, the basis of any real connection.

 

Homework

Before asking her out, ask yourself: Would I be friends with this person? If the answer is no, ask yourself why you’re asking her out in the first place.

 

  1. Put yourself in her world.

Imagine your dream woman. What kind of things does she enjoy doing? Art? Sports? Horses? Music? Go to places that attract the type of people you’d like to meet. It’s not impossible to meet someone special during last call at the bar, but the odds of making a real connection aren’t in your favor. You’re better off making connections in places more conducive to conversation or in places that group people together based on shared interest.

 

Homework

Generosity and altruism are always attractive, and it doesn’t necessarily mean opening your checkbook. Find an upcoming event that interests you, and volunteer your time.

 

  1. Be prepared to carry the conversation initially.

Let’s be clear: Women struggle with conversation as much as men, but men are generally tasked with breaking the ice. The good news is that you only need a few open-ended questions to get started.

The questions that are easiest to ask are going to be the same ones she’s answered from every other guy. Set yourself apart with questions that require her to answer from her emotional side, not her logical side. She mentions she completed a marathon. You could go with something obvious like, “Where did you run?” or, you could try something new like, “What is it like to cross the finish line after so many hours?” Giving her an opportunity to share an experience with you will, in some ways, allow her to relive it again with you.

 

Homework

Did your last date feel like an interview? If so, the talk-to-listen ratio wasn’t balanced. Remember, G*d gave you two ears and one mouth. Listen twice as much as you talk. Next conversation, limit yourself to asking two consecutive questions. Give her an opportunity to learn about you.

 

  1. Let your actions—not your words—show her who you are.

If you’ve found professional success, and it’s serving you well, you shouldn’t need to spell this out. Talking about what you have, who you know, and what you can provide isn’t attractive; it’s validation-seeking behavior. A quality woman won’t be with you for your bank account or Rolodex; she manages her own finances and social network.

If you’re outlining reasons for her to be with you, she will wonder why you feel the need to convince her. Spearhead a more interesting conversation about common interests or something that has less to do with your success and more to do with things you enjoy.

 

Homework

Instead of starting with the basic questions and getting more specific, work in the opposite direction. See how long you can talk without mentioning what you do for work. Engineering the conversation this way will force you to talk about the life you lead outside of the office. If this is challenging, it’s time to take some serious vacation and turn your phone off.

 

Attracting a quality woman begins with a fostering a stable, healthy relationship with yourself. These dating tips are just a few ways you can capture some interest; living your truth and being comfortable with who you are is the best place to start.