Announcing our newest Bay Area bachelor… He’s 39, tall, fit, successful, philanthropic, and so much more…

We are thrilled to announce a new search for a Bay Area based client. Our bachelor is an intellectually curious, philanthropically inclined 39-year old with a passion for cycling and Bay Area outdoor living. He’s 6’1″, with a lean, fit musculature, full head of salt and pepper hair, piercing blue eyes, and well-groomed facial hair. 

He grew up on the East Coast and came to California for grad school, and his sense of style is understated but refined, reflecting his affinity for both coasts.

As a successful technical consultant to an established client base of energy and logistics companies, he works with a small team to develop algorithms and analytics to improve operational efficiency.  This candidate has an undergraduate degree in philosophy from the University of Chicago, a masters from a top tier university, and a PhD in engineering from Berkeley.

Work-life balance is tremendously important to him, and he makes plenty of time for his hobbies. He’s currently reading Kazuo Ishiguro’s recent novel Klara and the Sun, and Patrick Sharkey’s study of the moral complexities of violence and policing, An Uneasy Peace. He also enjoys movies, cooking for friends, hiking, running, swimming, and road cycling, to name a few. 

With his flexible job, he’s been known to work remotely while pursuing outdoor adventures from the Caribbean or the Mediterranean, or just spending a few weeks with his family on the East Coast. This could also give him the ability to date outside the Bay Area, for the right woman.  

Post-pandemic, he’s excited to get back out and enjoy cultural offerings, whether it’s at the museum of modern art, the symphony hall, or an indie music show at the Fox Theater. He actively supports charities that work in global poverty and disease, Covid relief, animal welfare, and more.

These days he’s getting involved with an Oakland charity that prevents violence by intervening in moments of crisis. He is politically moderate and is open to matches of any political persuasion that does not divide the world into good and bad people.

A few years ago our bachelor turned to meditation and therapy to reach a new level of self-awareness and elevate himself as a human being. He finds that it has helped him a ton not only knowing more about himself, but to be open to other people’s values and experience, and to communicate effectively with honesty and emotion. That’s the aspiration, anyway — he will always be a work in progress and is excited to meet someone with a self-awareness about herself and others as well. 

Our client is looking for a woman in her early 30s or late 20s who is intelligent, thoughtful, athletic, and motivated by growth, learning, and enjoyment, rather than by status and material things. He’s ready to enjoy the good life with that special someone and hopes to build a strong partnership, marriage, and family one day.  🙂

If you feel you or someone you know could be a wonderful fit for this darling guy, please email Amy at: amy@linxdating.com and as always, no fees for qualifying candidates.

Dating a man in his 40’s: 4 things he wants you to know

Dating a man in his 40s is an exciting experience. He wants to provide for a companion and has the means to do so—unlike many younger men, he’s usually established in his career and rather self-assured about his place in the world. In fact, studies like this one from the Atlantic show that a man’s desirability typically peaks around their 40s and 50s.

On the other side of the coin, there’s also a higher likelihood that he’s been married and/or has children. Though this isn’t necessarily a bad thing, it may be daunting for some women.

So, what are the top 4 essential things to know about dating a man in his 40s?

(1) He likes clarity and honesty

A man in his 40s is more discerning and direct about his dating life—and expects you to be the same. 

Playing games like intentionally delaying messaging back for a few days, playing hard to get, or talking about other men to entice jealousy doesn’t sit well—for a man in his 40s, this behavior is more likely to be interpreted as a lack of commitment, and he may simply assume that you’re disinterested. 

He’ll appreciate you clearly expressing your interest, and he’ll also appreciate an honest and direct conversation if you’re not interested. With life experience behind him, he’ll more than graciously accept a thoughtful rejection, rather than a slow, time-wasting denouement. 

(2) He needs his space

A man in his 40s is serious about keeping up with his responsibilities. You’ll have to respect that he may be preoccupied during the day and may not always message back immediately, or that he might want to get to bed early in order to wake up early. 

The good news is that you’ll have more time to focus on yourself, especially when you have your own business, friends, and hobbies. 

(3) He may want a family

While every situation is different, it would be wrong to assume that every man in his 40s wouldn’t be interested in starting a family with you simply because he is divorced or has kids already.

If he has kids already, it is also important to understand that he may take his time to introduce you to them—this is normal as he’ll want to be assured things are serious before he takes that step in intertwining your lives. Again, give him the space to do this at his own pace.

(4) He’s not a fixer-upper

Lastly, studies like this one by Costa and McRae have shown that personality traits remain relatively stable in adults after 30. This explains why it is incredibly challenging—or nearly impossible—to fundamentally change a 40-year-old’s personality, and it is important to recognize that trying to do so will most likely only lead to frustration for both of you.

So, for example, if he’s consistently not interested in an outdoor hike on your favorite trail, then chances are slim that he’ll ever be.

A man in his 40s has been shaped by his life experiences, both good and bad, and he’ll have a much stronger sense of self for it. The major benefit for you—if you have the chance to be with someone who truly knows himself—is that this illuminates a clearer path to connection.

If you find yourself searching for love but not knowing where to begin, don’t hesitate to get in touch—I’m here to help. 

Wishing you love and good health,

Amy

She’s a former rocket scientist turned attorney who’s seeking her self-assured co-pilot to navigate life with…Linx UPDATE…this client got married to her Linx sweetheart in 2020! Congrats

FOR SINGLE MEN AGES 40-56

Our confident and classy bachelorette is a late 40s native Californian of Chinese descent.  Standing at 5’6” (if you manage to catch her without her high heels on), she is slender with wavy black hair, a playful attitude, and a compassionate heart.

Professionally, she is a lawyer but before you instantly get put off by that, let’s clarify that she’s not your typical attorney.  She’s a former engineer that gave up designing planes for patents, so she considers herself a mix of geeky, intellectual, and fun.  Having a job that allows her to work from anywhere in the world, she has been fortunate enough to have traveled to over 40 countries and partake in some amazing adventures such as making the perfect pizza in Rome; exploring countless temples in Asia; spelunking in Australia and New Zealand; hot air ballooning over Cappadocia; cruising the Nile; dog sledding in the Arctic; and riding a camel into the Moroccan sunset.  An explorer at heart, there are still many journeys that she would love to fill her passport with – perhaps with you.     

Although our bachelorette is ambitious and driven in her goals and appreciate those qualities in a partner, she believes that happiness requires balance.  When she is not working or traveling, you will find her unwinding on a different hiking trail every week, catching up with friends, or unleashing her creative side in the kitchen.  Her ideal match should love or at least pretend to like carbs (and her cooking 😉).

While she has lived an amazing life, she believes it would be even better to share the fun and adventures with someone special.  Her best suited match is between the ages of 40-56 and Caucasian in heritage.  Friends would describe him as balanced and self-assured with a great sense of humor and strong core values.  He can easily engage in a serious discussion or trade witty banter but can also appreciate a comfortable silence.  Ideally, he’s established in his career, politically right leaning, and is looking for a fellow traveler with whom to explore life and the world.   

Although our client is based in Silicon Valley, she can picture herself basking in the idyllic lifestyle of the South – you know, bucolic green lawns, scrumptious comfort food, Southern hospitality, and raising a family with you.  Her ideal match has a bit of wanderlust to adventurous spirit and likes the idea of splitting time elsewhere or escaping the Bay Area entirely. 

If you or anyone you know might make a fantastic match for our bachelorette, please email Amy directly at: amy@linxdating.com

There are ZERO fees for qualifying candidates. Thank you!

This Week at Linx

Just in…a nice little testimonial from a client of Linx…

I had a great experience with Linx & Amy. She listened to me very well in the interview, & within a year, she had 2 good matches for me. The first one in September; the second one in June. One match was so close that we dated for a year, & we have remained wonderful friends.I have recommended my friends to her. Match-making is not a science; it’s not a sure thing to find a match. But the odds are better than other services where there is no screening (other than by yourself) or going out to advertised “singles” events. Her pricing is steep but life is like that at times.

This week has been super crazy busy at work especially with the mention in the Sunday style section of The New York Times. Lots of great inquires from all over have been landing in my inbox. I’ve received so many emails from prospects- especially really young movers and shakers in tech (think FB, Twitter, Palantir, Box) and a lot of folks in the VC and angel investment community as well. From San Francisco, to San Jose, Atherton, to Manhattan, and Newport Beach. Funny how the NYT mentioned LinkedIn as a resource for me scouting talent. I haven’t logged into my LinkedIn profile in probably twelve years. No offense Mr. Jeff Weiner. wink wink.

With Halloween right around the corner, why not head out in true Silicon Valley style with your own chic personalized dress-literally.
Wearing your Facebook profile as a dress takes social media to a whole new level. Talk about an ice breaker!

I‘ve seen a funny trend in the past two weeks with multiple couples coupling up who share the same name. For instance three male clients named Mark who were matched to three totally different girls named Sally and now each new couple reports back that they are going exclusive. Mark + Sally couple #1, Mark + Sally couple #2, and Mark + Sally couple #3. I haven’t seen that one ever actually. Had some great meetings today with clients and prospects and the rest of the week is about matchmaking, client calls, and some fun work related projects. That’s all for now.

Follow me on Twitter @linxdating

Last Week in Perspective

This past week, we completed two intense and inspiring days of individual interviews at our Spring casting in Palo Alto. Meeting after meeting, we met exceptional women and men of all ages coming out to see if they have what it takes to meet some of our current VIP clients. I always learn so much from these candidates. One funny woman shared enthusiastically the Shanghainese tradition of gifting 18 hams to the matchmaker who has successfully matched you. Being Shanghainese, she said “Marry me off and you’ll have 18 hams coming your way! I hope you like ham.”

So, what are these high caliber, successful single professionals saying? A lot! Here are a few nuggets of wisdom from our meetings we’d like to share with you:

I’ve been on a ton of dates, the men only seem to be interested in their own time table and agenda.

The well for getting set up from friends is shrinking by the minute!

I feel like I need to stop doing online dating. I don’t want to become jaded. I need to take a break, breathe, and get a fresh perspective.

I love flirting! I try to make eye contact in my everyday life and never look at my cell phone as a crutch when walking down the street.  Make eye contact, you just never know.

I am a modern woman who appreciates traditional values. But that means monogamy and a partnership. A relationship where it is one man and one woman. Not multiple partners.

The girl I was really into just did nothing all day and her life revolved around mine. It is so important to have a match who has her own thing going on. She would wait for me to come home, like a puppy dog, and just glum on. It was stifling. She had no life outside of mine.

People need to stop being hot and cold in relationships. Finding someone who is emotionally predictable is important. I hate always feeling like I am walking on eggshells.

It is a gift to put a woman at ease when dating. I love a man who is a gentleman and kindhearted.

My mother recently said just find any husband. As long as he has a pulse, the whole family will be delighted!  😉

Teure Suche nach Miss und Mister Right (Expensive search for Ms and Mr. Right)

Linx was just featured in Süddeutsche Zeitung in Germany by journalist Matthias Kolb. Here is the article for those of you who can read German. Süddeutsche Zeitung is largest German national subscription daily newspaper. 

Im Silicon Valley wird alles Mögliche outgesourct – selbst die Liebe. Das ist ein Glück für Menschen wie Amy Andersen: Die Linxdating-Gründerin arrangiert Dates. Manche Kunden überweisen dafür mehr als 50.000 Dollar. Fünfter Teil der Serie über Kaliforniens Hightech-Standort.

Wenn es um das Silicon Valley geht, dann ist die Rede von Innovationen, technischem Fortschritt und den immergleichen Unternehmen: Apple, Google und Facebook. Doch die Besonderheit des 77 Kilometer langen Streifen, der im Norden Kaliforniens von San Francisco durch das Santa-Clara-Tal runter nach San José führt, machen erst die zahlreichen Start-ups und deren Gründerinnen und Gründer aus.

In einer kleinen Artikelserie lassen wir acht Persönlichkeiten aus der Hightech-Region zu Wort kommen – Unternehmer und TV-Sternchen, Amerikas erfolgreichsten Immobilienmakler und einen Deutschen, der an einem “Start-up-Kompass” tüftelt, der Gründern vorhersagt, ob ihre Projekte durchstarten oder scheitern werden. Bereits zu Wort kamen David Sacks, Chef des sozialen Netzwerks Yammer, Cameron Teitelman, Leiter des StartX-Gründerzentrums der Uni Stanford, Soujanha Bhumkar, Gründer des Start-ups Cooliris und Björn Lasse Herrmann, Gründer des Start-up-Kompasses. Heute stellen wir Amy Andersen, 36, Chefin der Dating-Agentur Linxdating vor.

Im Silicon Valley gibt es viele Menschen, die alle Lebensbereiche outsourcen: Sie haben eigene Fitnesstrainer und jemanden, der ihre Mahlzeiten zusammenstellt. Die Liebe ist da keine Ausnahme. Ich habe meine Agentur Linxdating 2003 gegründet und helfe seitdem Investoren, Entwicklern, Programmierern und Managern dabei, den richtigen Partner fürs Leben zu finden. Meine typischen Kunden haben sich sehr auf ihre berufliche oder akademische Karriere konzentriert. Es ist fast so, als hätten sie sich unter einem Stein versteckt. Die meisten haben ein bestimmtes Alter, wenn sie uns kontaktieren: die Frauen sind etwa 33, Männer 38 bis 39.

Ich mache keine Werbung – neue Kunden kommen aufgrund von Empfehlungen zu mir. Sie müssen einen ausführlichen Fragebogen ausfüllen und auch Fotos ihrer Ex-Partner vorlegen. Wir führen ausführliche Gespräche, um Vertrauen aufzubauen und damit ich erahnen kann, wonach meine Klienten suchen und welche Eigenschaften ihnen wichtig sind. Ich weiß: Diese Menschen sind reich, jung und gut ausgebildet und sollten keine Probleme haben, einen Partner zu finden können. Doch viele wissen gar nicht, wie sie sich bei den Dates verhalten sollen, die ich für sie arrangiere.

Einen meiner Kunden, ein junger Manager von Facebook, hat schon der Gedanke an ein Date ängstlich gemacht. Ständig hat er gefragt: “Amy, worüber soll ich mit ihr denn reden außer über die Arbeit?” Um ihm zu helfen, habe ich einfach ein Gespräch mit ihm geführt und ihn nach Filmen, Büchern und seinem Lieblingswein gefragt. Er hat sehr viel geredet und das hat ihm sehr gefallen.”

Der Preis für meine Dienstleistungen richtet sich nach Umfang des Services. Für acht garantierte Dates innerhalb von 2 Jahren berechne ich 20.000 Dollar – natürlich gebe ich auch Tipps für die passende Garderobe, schlage passende Restaurants vor oder arrangiere eine Limousine. VIP-Kunden überweisen mindestens 50.000 Dollar.

Zeit ist wichtiger als Geld

Manche Klienten haben spezielle Wünsche: Ihr Traumpartner soll nicht nur eine bestimmte Haarfarbe haben, sondern auch einen bestimmten Abschluss von einer bestimmten Uni. Da muss ich wie eine Jägerin nach dieser Person suchen. Weil ihnen Zeit wichtiger ist als Geld und meine Diskretion schätzen, sind die Kunden bereit, diese Summen zu zahlen. Sie sorgen sich eher, dass sich ihr Gegenüber mehr über ihren Kontostand als für die eigene Persönlichkeit interessiert.

Natürlich ist dieser plötzliche Reichtum, diese Millionen, mit denen sie nicht gerechnet haben, etwas Großartiges, aber es macht auch Angst und kann zur Last werden. Also mache ich Rollenspiele mit ihnen: “Oh mein, Gott, du arbeitest bei Google/Facebook? Wie geht es deinem Aktiendepot und hast du schon mal Mark Zuckerberg getroffen?” Viele Leute stellen diese Fragen und darauf müssen sie vorbereitet sein. Nur so können sie herausfinden, ob ein Mädchen aus Interesse fragt oder weil sie eine sogenannte “Goldgräberin” ist.

Die Tatsache, dass ich alle Kandidaten wochenlang überprüfe und es allein 1000 Dollar kostet, in meine Kartei aufgenommen zu werden, ist sehr wirksam. Wer sich an mich wendet, sucht keine schnelle Affäre, sondern einen Partner mit ähnlichen Interessen, der ihn oder sie intellektuell herausfordert. Meine Kunden sind high profiles, die nicht mit einem Kollegen ausgehen oder in einer Bar nach Mister oder Miss Right suchen. Sie wissen, dass dies nicht passieren wird, und für Online-Dating sind sie zu vorsichtig. Also steht nach Bedarf nach Angeboten wie dem von Linxdating.